Each time I write out my blog, I struggle with wanting to catch EVERY error, whether it be grammatical or spelling. It is during that time that I feel stressed, and lose sight of everything that HE has just taught me. HIS Daily Teachings today is HIS loving reminder that I am perfectly....... well imperfect!
HE is wanting me to know that if I were perfect, then I wouldn't need HIM. Since I've already established through several other posts that I do in fact need HIM, I know that it is truly the work, of my "inner critic" to be my "kill joy" in my journey that I am seeking HIM daily to teach, lead, and guide me to wholeness.
HE is wanting me to know that the perfection that I strive for is okay, however I just fail to see that it isn't until till the "the other side of HEAVEN" where I will be made whole, and I will be perfect. HE is wanting me to remember that by allowing my "inner critic" to control me in my impossible quest for protect here on Earth, I without even realizing it have allowed the same "inner critic" to take up residence and torture and get my own children "worked up."
This morning HE is reminding me of my childhood when I strived at one point to please my parents. However the more I strived the harder I fell. Just when I thought I did things the "right way," they quickly came along and let me know that NOT only did I do it wrong, but I was so "foolish" in taking pride in my work, that I was blind if I "thought" I did a good job. Trying to live up to their constant demands of perfection was exhausting, and HIS loving reminder to me today was this: "ALL of the things that have allowed your "inner critic" to break you on, well you have done the same to your children. I am calling on you today Heather, to break the cycle. Through you I will create a new mindset of WHOSE they are, and they will then be able to be filled with MY endless JOY, and it will spill out of you."
I can't begin to tell you just how much I love, enjoy, and look forward to HIS Daily Teachings in my day. They are truly what help keep me focused on the bigger picture, and what helps me recover much quicker when I have made a mistake. It is the very reason I am able to answer this question, "knowing now what you do, would you want to continue to go through tests and trials?" To this I would say, "YES, as I know that HE is there with me, leading, guiding, and teaching me. Loving me through everything and because HE has proven to me time and again that every trial and every test was designed to make me grow, my faith, my trust, and my love for HIM.
In choosing to accept that I am perfectly.... well imperfect I know that I must be strongly rooted in my faith. It is not surprising to me that HE is teaching me this now, as it has taken me this long, through many of HIS teachings, and through many tests and trials to get me to this point. HE is wanting me to know that had HE tried to teach this concept to me earlier in my walk, it would have confused me, and I wouldn't have been able to appreciate just what HE was saying to me.
"Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong." Ephesians 3:17
HE is wanting me to know that in choosing to hold tight to my faith in HIM, and focusing on "becoming Mary," that is when I will become more CHRIST LIKE. HE is telling me once again that in everything that I do, think, or say I must ask myself this question, "would JESUS bless this?" Pastor Brian Sanders, Elevate Church, Morton, IL
In continuing on my journey to "becoming Mary" HE is wanting me to understand that even though I "think" I am "helping" by placing my "expectations" on my family to which they couldn't possibly meet, I am causing more damage as their own "inner critic," will open the door to self-doubt just as it did to me. HE is telling me that since that door was opened at a early age, I have missed out on so much of HIS JOY that has been there all along just for me. This I know I do NOT want to be my own children's truth, therefore I know that I must choose to practice acceptance that I am perfectly.... well imperfect and so are they! I must model to my children that we are ALL children of the living GOD, and HE is with us, ready to teach, lead, and guide us through every single step of our journey. That HIS grace, HIS peace, HIS love, HIS mercy, HIS forgiveness, and HIS joy is there, it is ours, so we must claim it!
In choosing acceptance of WHOSE I am, it is then that I will be able to live with HIS peace, and HIS JOY that I am accepted just as I am, perfectly...... well imperfect! Kay Warren writes "YOU and I need to fire our "inner critic."" HE is teaching me that when I choose to accept that I, Heather am perfectly..... well imperfect, my JOY in today, as well as my hope for tomorrow can grow. HE is wanting me to know that being perfectly.....well imperfect means that I must choose to fight to keep HIS peace, HIS grace, HIS trust, balance, and acceptance in my heart and mind. I must seek HIM daily to create in my a content filled heart and mind because of WHOSE I am.
This morning HE is reminding me of one of my heart's cry that is I so desperately desire, want, and need to live out my faith contagiously! HE is wanting me to know that when I choose to live this way, it is then that not only will I be able to nurture HIS JOY in my own heart, but it will spill out of me, and onto others. I must seek HIM, and ask HIM to teach, lead, and guide me so that HIS endless JOY will be evident in my life, and I will then be able to bear witness to any and ALL who choose to accept JESUS CHRIST as their LORD and SAVIOR.
This morning as I journaled I wrote out this prayer: "LORD JESUS create in me a heart and mind to be a woman of grace and trust. Let all of my thoughts, actions, and words be a loving reflection of WHO YOU are! Let YOUR JOY overflow out of my life, and spill onto other's lives. Lead me LORD to where my trust is without borders, and where the waters run deep, where I need only to depend on YOU. Let YOUR word run deep through my heart and mind so that I will be changed. Lead me to become a woman of JOY! OH how I love you JESUS, in YOUR HOLY, MIGHTY, and JUST name! Amen!
I pray today for peace in your hearts that you too are perfectly.... well imperfect. I pray that you will be at peace with that because of WHOSE you are! I pray that if you don't already know WHOSE you are, that you will have the courage to seek HIM, and when you do, you will find HIM. I pray that the LORD GOD of your life, will pour HIS blessings and favor of your life, and you will come under HIS authority and allow HIM to teach, lead, and guide you through every single step of your own journey towards wholeness. I pray that you too will be able to live your life with a contagious faith, and that HIS JOY will pour out of you and spill onto others.
Blessings,
Heather
This is an account of my early morning walks of faith with my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. In searching for accountablity for me, the LORD used it as encouragement for others. I pray blessings for each and every life who reads HIS Daily Teachings
Sunday, February 16, 2014
Saturday, February 15, 2014
"emotional eruption"
This past Wednesday was the last time I blogged, and that is because shortly after I wrote the blog Balanced Life, my world whole erupted, and I was left in the aftermath drowned in tears and sorrow. Within hours of writing, I had been focusing on getting tasks done before my boys woke up. D had been working with client the night before, and missed out on dinner and family time. The kids and I were really missing him, and this particular morning I really needed him to buy some milk for our 16 month old son. Very quickly he told me know that he was "too busy," and that I would have to go do it myself.
What happened next is written directly from my nightmares. Before I or he could even realize we became Satan's puppets and we were the stars of his show, and so began the story of, "watch how D and Heather push each other's buttons."
The final thing D said to me that morning was, "I'm never going to apologize to you, because of everything I have been through for the past 19 years." To which set of the ticking time-bomb known as "Brunhilda." This is the other side of "me" that D named a long time ago.
"Brunhilda" had one mission that morning and that was to seek and destroy. My response to D saying that to me threw me into a fit of rage, and the only way I could describe it was, I could hear myself, I knew it was wrong, but I couldn't stop it, I knew I was moving around, but it didn't feel like me. It was almost like I had a total out-of-body experience. Somehow I managed to say to him, "when you leave today I'm going to cry like I've never cried before."
Somehow I managed to climb the stairs and made it into our room. I locked the door, and laid down in my closet. I cried as if though I were dying;. I sure felt like I was. I cried so hard that I hurt D, and I said horrible hurtful, hateful things to him. I cried because four of my children witnessed their Mama's fit of rage. I cried because I didn't understand where all that anger came from.
After about an hour of crying in my closet. I stood in front of my mirror, and and heard him say, "what do you see?" I was surprised at what I began to say. I said, I looked awful, as my makeup was all off my face, I noticed how much extra weight I have been carrying, and I began to replay the morning's events in my mind, and quickly became overwhelmed in an ocean of tears.
As I stood their crying and sobbing, I suddenly began to say, "I'm ANGRY!!!" I acknowledge all the hatred and animosity that I had stored up, buried so deep inside me. It was if though I had just experienced and survived my second "emotional eruption."
I laid down on my bed, and it was as if though I were laying right in JESUS lap, and HE was comforting me. I kept hearing the line from my favorite childhood song, "I'll shine a light for you." It was as it at that very moment of brokenness that I could hear HIM speaking to me.
As soon as my two daughters left for school I went downstairs to check on my boys, and I quickly called my sister-in-love. I cried my heart out to her, asking for her prayers, and the other side of the line was so eerily silent. I didn't know what to think at first, because I was so incredibly embarrassed that I behaved like that, and I was so scared that I hurt D so badly that he would NEVER forgive me. I so desperately needed to know that I was going to be okay.
She listened to me for quite sometime before she spoke, and finally she said, "if we don't have grace, than what do we have?" Though I didn't fully understand what she was saying to me at that moment, I know that it was HIM preparing my heart to receive a really tough dose in forgiveness, letting go, grace, mercy, and unconditional love.
We finished our conversation and she told me she would pray for me. I must have cried another 3 or 4 oceans of tears after that, and I still felt so defeated. I text D and told him everything that I felt about myself, and how I hated myself for how I treated him. I told him that I didn't blame him for how he felt, as I couldn't forgive myself for everything he has been through with me and my past.
Still feeling incredibly unnerved by the mornings events I text my soul-sister "M." She quickly made time to call me, as she knew that she had heared HIS whisper and knew that she must heed it! The amount of prayer, and words of wisdom that I received that day, was more than I could have ever imagined. My tears began to flow cleansing tears, as the bondage's, and agreements with Satan began to crumble, and disappear. I said to her at one point, "growing is so tough," to which she replied, "no your wrong, growing is so awesome!" I think I might have felt a little anger towards her at that point. After about three hours on the phone with her I hung up, feeling more at peace, but still unsure of not only why this happened, but what I should do about it.
On Thursday morning I woke up after NOT really sleeping too well, and made my way downstairs to journal, and well honestly just journal as the last thing on my mind was "Choose JOY." What I saw when I came into the office startled me. There was D sleeping. My heart broke over again, into a million pieces, and the tears began to fall. I grabbed my journal and went into the living room, cried out my heart to GOD, and quickly decided I needed to laugh.
When I turned on the t.v. to watch one of my favorite shows, it was still on the channel from the previous night. What I heard next floored me, and I quickly realized that it was HIS Daily Teaching, and it was as if though HE were saying to me, "ready or not, here I come!"
A Pastor was speaking about LOVE, and the show was called "Marriage Mythbusters." The myth that day was, "Time Heals ALL Wounds." In just five minutes it was revealed to me that not only does time NOT heal all wounds, but rather deepens wounds, as they dig deeper, and fester inside, until finally an "emotional eruption" occurs.
It was at that very moment HE had captured my heart once again. Though the show was over, I went online and ordered the marriage devotional, and saw that there was a media link. I began to watch the message that I had just heard the last five minutes of, and I was floored by what the Pastor was speaking about.
I quickly grabbed my journal and began writing out HIS Daily Teachings, that until this morning I still didn't quite fully understand what HE was asking of me. That morning HE began to teach me about HIS love, and what HIS love meant for my marriage to D. HE began to fill me with HIS truth about WHO I am called to be, and HE did it all through HIS words as it is written in Colossians 3:12-14
" Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience." Colossians 3:12
It was through HIS words that I final understood where I went wrong the previous morning and why things happened the way they did. HE is telling me that I must take on HIS characteristics so that I will be able to understand how HE is able to LOVE. HE is telling me that when speaking to D, I must do so with mercy, meaning I must be able to forgive. Kindness, meaning I must speak life-building words. Humility, meaning I must be HIS servant, I must always willing to say "I'm sorry" first. Gentleness, meaning seeking HIM and asking HIM to help me on my journey to "becoming Mary." Finally Patience, meaning I must stop trying to force my hand into situations in my life, and trust that HIS timing and provision are absolutely and undoubtedly perfect for my life.
"Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. " Colossians 3:13
Looking back at the events that transpired this past Wednesday and Thursday I now know that HE is telling me that I have just gone through another level of forgiveness. Though I said this on Thursday I didn't really grasp it until last night, and well again this morning. What I know is that not only is "growing awesome, it is also completely "freeing." I'm saying "freeing," because now that HIS truth about the bondage's and agreements I made at a very young age were revealed, Satan has lost ALL power over that area of my life with me. HE has been teaching me that forgiveness means that I must be able to forgive so that I will be able to receive freedom in HIM. HE is wanting me to know that it took me going through another "emotional eruption," to be able to fully understand just how much anger, hurt, and unforgiveness I had buried so deep within me. HE began to take me through all of the hurt and anger I had stored up, and why I felt the way I did.
"Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony" Colossians 3:14
Through the Pastor's message HE began to speak to me about the "risk" HE took. Pastor's words said, LOVE means being willing to take the RISK, putting yourself out there, loving as GOD loves you. He went on to describe how GOD took a "risk" by sending HIS only SON to live and die for our sins, so that we would one day be reconciled to HIM.
"For God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life. God sent his Son into the world not to judge the world, but to save the world through him." John 3:16-17
He went on to say about the "risk" HE took was that we, I, Heather a broken sinner would choose to BELIEVE HIS word and HIS promise, that HE is WHO HE says HE is, and HE did what has been written. That HIS SON JESUS CHRIST died for my sins, so that I would then be reconciled back to HIM, when I chose to accept JESUS into my heart, and allowed HIM to be LORD of my life.
A couple weekends ago, our Pastor spoke about this very thing, and though I "thought" I got what he was saying, it wasn't until my "emotional eruption," that I was fully able to understand the "risk" GOD took for me, and the PRICE that JESUS paid for me.
Last night HE answered another one of my prayers, as D not only had us get dressed up for a night out, he also showered me with gifts that were not only meant for just me, but meant for the both of us, gifts to help build our marriage. He bought a devotionals and other books for him and I to help in "becoming Mary." He also bought several reminders of the current theme in my life which has been, and will continue to be "Choose JOY!"
This morning I feel lighter and have so much more clarity about why I have struggled for so long. Today I know that I have so much more clarity about WHOSE I am and what I am called to do. I am thankful to be able to live in HIS love daily, and know that HIS mercy and grace are new every morning for me. I am thankful that I can truly say, "though there may be pain in the night, JOY comes in the morning!"
I pray today that if you are struggling with your "feelings," that you will have the courage to seek HIM, and ask HIM to reveal to you what is hurting you. I pray that HE will release you from the pain that you have buried deep within your heart. I pray that if you too are going through a season of growing, I pray that you will know that it is NOT HIS intention to hurt you, but rather to grow you. I pray for you to be able to call on HIM as your strength to help you through your "darkest hours, and emotional eruptions." I pray for you to be filled with HIS peace, HIS mercy, HIS grace, HIS forgiveness, and most importantly HIS love.
Dear friends, this has been a tough blog to write, as even though I "thought" I was dealing with things from my past, I have learned that I'm never going to be through with "growing" until I am with HIM in HEAVEN, and OH what a glorious day that will be!!!
Blessings,
Heather
:
What happened next is written directly from my nightmares. Before I or he could even realize we became Satan's puppets and we were the stars of his show, and so began the story of, "watch how D and Heather push each other's buttons."
The final thing D said to me that morning was, "I'm never going to apologize to you, because of everything I have been through for the past 19 years." To which set of the ticking time-bomb known as "Brunhilda." This is the other side of "me" that D named a long time ago.
"Brunhilda" had one mission that morning and that was to seek and destroy. My response to D saying that to me threw me into a fit of rage, and the only way I could describe it was, I could hear myself, I knew it was wrong, but I couldn't stop it, I knew I was moving around, but it didn't feel like me. It was almost like I had a total out-of-body experience. Somehow I managed to say to him, "when you leave today I'm going to cry like I've never cried before."
Somehow I managed to climb the stairs and made it into our room. I locked the door, and laid down in my closet. I cried as if though I were dying;. I sure felt like I was. I cried so hard that I hurt D, and I said horrible hurtful, hateful things to him. I cried because four of my children witnessed their Mama's fit of rage. I cried because I didn't understand where all that anger came from.
After about an hour of crying in my closet. I stood in front of my mirror, and and heard him say, "what do you see?" I was surprised at what I began to say. I said, I looked awful, as my makeup was all off my face, I noticed how much extra weight I have been carrying, and I began to replay the morning's events in my mind, and quickly became overwhelmed in an ocean of tears.
As I stood their crying and sobbing, I suddenly began to say, "I'm ANGRY!!!" I acknowledge all the hatred and animosity that I had stored up, buried so deep inside me. It was if though I had just experienced and survived my second "emotional eruption."
I laid down on my bed, and it was as if though I were laying right in JESUS lap, and HE was comforting me. I kept hearing the line from my favorite childhood song, "I'll shine a light for you." It was as it at that very moment of brokenness that I could hear HIM speaking to me.
As soon as my two daughters left for school I went downstairs to check on my boys, and I quickly called my sister-in-love. I cried my heart out to her, asking for her prayers, and the other side of the line was so eerily silent. I didn't know what to think at first, because I was so incredibly embarrassed that I behaved like that, and I was so scared that I hurt D so badly that he would NEVER forgive me. I so desperately needed to know that I was going to be okay.
She listened to me for quite sometime before she spoke, and finally she said, "if we don't have grace, than what do we have?" Though I didn't fully understand what she was saying to me at that moment, I know that it was HIM preparing my heart to receive a really tough dose in forgiveness, letting go, grace, mercy, and unconditional love.
We finished our conversation and she told me she would pray for me. I must have cried another 3 or 4 oceans of tears after that, and I still felt so defeated. I text D and told him everything that I felt about myself, and how I hated myself for how I treated him. I told him that I didn't blame him for how he felt, as I couldn't forgive myself for everything he has been through with me and my past.
Still feeling incredibly unnerved by the mornings events I text my soul-sister "M." She quickly made time to call me, as she knew that she had heared HIS whisper and knew that she must heed it! The amount of prayer, and words of wisdom that I received that day, was more than I could have ever imagined. My tears began to flow cleansing tears, as the bondage's, and agreements with Satan began to crumble, and disappear. I said to her at one point, "growing is so tough," to which she replied, "no your wrong, growing is so awesome!" I think I might have felt a little anger towards her at that point. After about three hours on the phone with her I hung up, feeling more at peace, but still unsure of not only why this happened, but what I should do about it.
On Thursday morning I woke up after NOT really sleeping too well, and made my way downstairs to journal, and well honestly just journal as the last thing on my mind was "Choose JOY." What I saw when I came into the office startled me. There was D sleeping. My heart broke over again, into a million pieces, and the tears began to fall. I grabbed my journal and went into the living room, cried out my heart to GOD, and quickly decided I needed to laugh.
When I turned on the t.v. to watch one of my favorite shows, it was still on the channel from the previous night. What I heard next floored me, and I quickly realized that it was HIS Daily Teaching, and it was as if though HE were saying to me, "ready or not, here I come!"
A Pastor was speaking about LOVE, and the show was called "Marriage Mythbusters." The myth that day was, "Time Heals ALL Wounds." In just five minutes it was revealed to me that not only does time NOT heal all wounds, but rather deepens wounds, as they dig deeper, and fester inside, until finally an "emotional eruption" occurs.
It was at that very moment HE had captured my heart once again. Though the show was over, I went online and ordered the marriage devotional, and saw that there was a media link. I began to watch the message that I had just heard the last five minutes of, and I was floored by what the Pastor was speaking about.
I quickly grabbed my journal and began writing out HIS Daily Teachings, that until this morning I still didn't quite fully understand what HE was asking of me. That morning HE began to teach me about HIS love, and what HIS love meant for my marriage to D. HE began to fill me with HIS truth about WHO I am called to be, and HE did it all through HIS words as it is written in Colossians 3:12-14
" Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience." Colossians 3:12
It was through HIS words that I final understood where I went wrong the previous morning and why things happened the way they did. HE is telling me that I must take on HIS characteristics so that I will be able to understand how HE is able to LOVE. HE is telling me that when speaking to D, I must do so with mercy, meaning I must be able to forgive. Kindness, meaning I must speak life-building words. Humility, meaning I must be HIS servant, I must always willing to say "I'm sorry" first. Gentleness, meaning seeking HIM and asking HIM to help me on my journey to "becoming Mary." Finally Patience, meaning I must stop trying to force my hand into situations in my life, and trust that HIS timing and provision are absolutely and undoubtedly perfect for my life.
"Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. " Colossians 3:13
Looking back at the events that transpired this past Wednesday and Thursday I now know that HE is telling me that I have just gone through another level of forgiveness. Though I said this on Thursday I didn't really grasp it until last night, and well again this morning. What I know is that not only is "growing awesome, it is also completely "freeing." I'm saying "freeing," because now that HIS truth about the bondage's and agreements I made at a very young age were revealed, Satan has lost ALL power over that area of my life with me. HE has been teaching me that forgiveness means that I must be able to forgive so that I will be able to receive freedom in HIM. HE is wanting me to know that it took me going through another "emotional eruption," to be able to fully understand just how much anger, hurt, and unforgiveness I had buried so deep within me. HE began to take me through all of the hurt and anger I had stored up, and why I felt the way I did.
"Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony" Colossians 3:14
Through the Pastor's message HE began to speak to me about the "risk" HE took. Pastor's words said, LOVE means being willing to take the RISK, putting yourself out there, loving as GOD loves you. He went on to describe how GOD took a "risk" by sending HIS only SON to live and die for our sins, so that we would one day be reconciled to HIM.
"For God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life. God sent his Son into the world not to judge the world, but to save the world through him." John 3:16-17
He went on to say about the "risk" HE took was that we, I, Heather a broken sinner would choose to BELIEVE HIS word and HIS promise, that HE is WHO HE says HE is, and HE did what has been written. That HIS SON JESUS CHRIST died for my sins, so that I would then be reconciled back to HIM, when I chose to accept JESUS into my heart, and allowed HIM to be LORD of my life.
A couple weekends ago, our Pastor spoke about this very thing, and though I "thought" I got what he was saying, it wasn't until my "emotional eruption," that I was fully able to understand the "risk" GOD took for me, and the PRICE that JESUS paid for me.
Last night HE answered another one of my prayers, as D not only had us get dressed up for a night out, he also showered me with gifts that were not only meant for just me, but meant for the both of us, gifts to help build our marriage. He bought a devotionals and other books for him and I to help in "becoming Mary." He also bought several reminders of the current theme in my life which has been, and will continue to be "Choose JOY!"
This morning I feel lighter and have so much more clarity about why I have struggled for so long. Today I know that I have so much more clarity about WHOSE I am and what I am called to do. I am thankful to be able to live in HIS love daily, and know that HIS mercy and grace are new every morning for me. I am thankful that I can truly say, "though there may be pain in the night, JOY comes in the morning!"
I pray today that if you are struggling with your "feelings," that you will have the courage to seek HIM, and ask HIM to reveal to you what is hurting you. I pray that HE will release you from the pain that you have buried deep within your heart. I pray that if you too are going through a season of growing, I pray that you will know that it is NOT HIS intention to hurt you, but rather to grow you. I pray for you to be able to call on HIM as your strength to help you through your "darkest hours, and emotional eruptions." I pray for you to be filled with HIS peace, HIS mercy, HIS grace, HIS forgiveness, and most importantly HIS love.
Dear friends, this has been a tough blog to write, as even though I "thought" I was dealing with things from my past, I have learned that I'm never going to be through with "growing" until I am with HIM in HEAVEN, and OH what a glorious day that will be!!!
Blessings,
Heather
:
Wednesday, February 12, 2014
Balanced Life
When I woke up this morning, I was singing Garth Brooks song "If Tomorrow Never Comes." Not really sure why I was singing it, I never would have imagined what it would mean for HIS Daily Teachings today. The following verses keep replaying over and over in my mind this morning: "If tomorrow never comes. Will she know how much I loved her? Did I try in every way, to show her every day? That she's my only one? And if my time on earth were through. And she must face the world without me. Is the love I gave her in the past, Gonna be enough to last? If tomorrow never comes?" Just typing that brings tears to my eyes, as I am asking myself those very questions about my family, my husband D, and my five children. Am I really living a life that shows them that if tomorrow never comes for me, will they live the rest of their lives knowing how much I truly loved and cared for them? What are my actions showing daily to them? As I struggle to put my thoughts into order, I am thankful for my loving HEAVENLY FATHER that HE is with me, leading me straight into today's teaching.
This morning HE has taken me through one of my typical days, and shown me where I am failing to live a balanced life. So often when my girls have left for school and my boys are done eating their breakfast, my mind starts to race of all of the things I "need" to accomplish for that day. It never fails that as soon as I get to work, one of them comes to me and wants to be held, or sang to, or wants me to read a story, or play a game, or watch a movie with them. My youngest always wants me to play with him, cars, trucks, ball, you name it, he can pretty much make a game out of anything. His newest game is throw something at Mama's face repeatedly until she looks at me, and then plays with me.
I wish I could say that I gladly accept their invitations to play and be silly, but more often than not resentment grows in my heart, as if to say, "don't these boys know that Mama is busy?" This morning, HE has revealed to me that the question I need to be asking is, "am I living a "busy life, or a lazy life?" Ouch! HE has opened my eyes up to what really happens in my day.
HE is showing me that though I may start out strong in getting things "done." How quickly I go from being "oh so busy" to laying on the couch flipping channels to see if the next episode of my show is on. Then, when they come to me and want to play I say things like, "yeah that's nice buddy," without even looking at them. This morning HE has captured my heart, and opened my eyes to a journal entry I wrote a few months ago about be able to live a balanced life.
Kay Warren writes "JOY withers in our lives when we are too busy!" I would go on to say the same when we become lazy. Maybe that's just me? HE is wanting me to know that I must learn to manage my time wisely. HE is telling me that I must stop saying YES to all the wrong things, and get my heart & mind focused on doing what I should be doing.
HE is wanting me to know that when I choose to devote all of my time doing the wrong things, I won't have any energy for my family. HE is wanting me to know that my energy crisis most importantly effects my relationship with HIM. As when I am tired, I am irritable, and cranky, and not willing to do much of anything without complaining or grumbling.
HE is wanting me to look really hard at my everyday for the past four months, am I living a "busy life, or a lazy life?" This morning HE is really making me take a good, hard, long look at how much time I waste in my day, either playing on Facebook, watching t.v., sleeping, or just sitting around feeling sorry for myself. HE is wanting me to know and understand how much time I waste procrastinating.
This morning Kay Warrens words have cut me like a knife, as they reveal who I am to my family, and friends. "I am convinced that most of us are terrific liars when it comes to busyness, but the person we lie to is ourselves." Today HE is showing me just how much I lie about why my energy is run down, well to be honest I am always tired, because all I ever want to do is lay around feeling sorry for myself.
This has been happening ever since we moved to our new town. Starting our new life has had its challenges, and rather than being proactive about it, I have chosen to be "lazy" about it, only this morning HE has revealed that I "try" to hide my true self as saying I am living a "busy life" when my reality is I am living a "lazy life."
Annie Dillard says "How we spend our days is of course, how we spend our lives."
"What becomes a pattern, becomes a way of life, and a busy way of life robs of JOY" Kay Warren "Choose JOY"
HE is wanting me to know that the same goes for a "lazy way of life." This morning HE has revealed to me an agreement that I have made in my heart that simply says, "why do today, what someone else can do tomorrow?" Knowing and understanding the truth behind this, makes me want to hide my face in shame. However it is because I know HE loves me that HIS truth is revealed to me through every single step I take with HIM in my journey towards wholeness. I am learning that in becoming whole I must be willing to face all of my mistakes, and allow HIM to show me where I have fallen short of HIS glory in my daily walks with HIM.
I have noticed that when I stay frumpy in my pajamas all day long, and don't do anything with my hair, or put any makeup on, those are the days that are the worst days. Those are the days where I am most sleepy, grumpy, and completely unproductive. HE has shown me that I fool myself in thinking that "Oh today will be different, I will get so much done by using the time that I take to get ready, to actually getting more things done. If take the time out to get ready I will lose my momentum." Oh, Heather, Heather, Heather, when will you ever learn? All this thinking does is lead me straight to the couch, to lie on pillows, and snuggle under blankets, after all I am just sooooo tired, says me after seven hours of sleep. Oh how rough my life has become raising five children. How demanding my family is of my time, and after all I did just do ten loads of laundry last week. Oh how the excuses pile up, and pretty soon, I feel so sorry for myself, that I reach for the nearest chocolate make a pot of coffee, and turn on the xbox to Netflix, and then well, I am gone for the day. Sorry kids, Mama is out to lunch, then snack, then dinner, and well Mama is just out. Don't bother talking to me, as I will only merely nod at you, but I won't really be listening, and ask me anything as this is the perfect time as I most likely will say yes if it means I won't have to pause my show..... again........
This morning HE is wanting me to know that HE is having me share this not to embarrass me, but to bring awareness to me of how the choices I am making affect the life that I am living. HE is wanting me to know that the balanced life, that I crave is right in front of me, I just have to give up the things I "think" I want to do, and do the things I must be doing.
HE is telling me that the very things that I get on my children daily about is a reflection of my guilt as I am the one teaching and modeling for them how to live a "busy life" or is it a "lazy life?" Okay, so I am seriously embarrassed now, as you are seeing the real me. HE is wanting me to start thinking about that if camera's were to follow me around all day long, what would they capture? Would the time that I have been blessed with be used wisely, or will I have had wasted all the time I had been given on doing wasteful, useless things? I cringe at the very thought of people seeing the real me.
HE is wanting me to know that if I will allow HIM, HE will show me how to go from living a "busy life, or a lazy life," to a Balanced life. Today HE is answering my question that I journaled, "how can I possibly manage it all?" HE is teaching me that it is all possible when I allow HIM to lead, mold, and shape me. Therefore, I must keep my eyes on HIM, and my ears open and ready to hear HIS whispers so that I am ready to do the things that I need to be doing.
I am learning that this does not mean letting go of my responsibilities when my boys want to play, but rather while they are napping or playing together, that is the time when I will be able to start the next load of laundry, vacuum the living room, or sweep the kitchen floor. I am learning that the only way I am ever going to be able to model what HE is teaching me is when I change my attitude of "busy life, or lazy life," to Balanced Life.
"It is useless for you to work so hard from early morning until late at night,
anxiously working for food to eat; for God gives rest to his loved ones." Psalm 127:2
This morning HE has taken me through one of my typical days, and shown me where I am failing to live a balanced life. So often when my girls have left for school and my boys are done eating their breakfast, my mind starts to race of all of the things I "need" to accomplish for that day. It never fails that as soon as I get to work, one of them comes to me and wants to be held, or sang to, or wants me to read a story, or play a game, or watch a movie with them. My youngest always wants me to play with him, cars, trucks, ball, you name it, he can pretty much make a game out of anything. His newest game is throw something at Mama's face repeatedly until she looks at me, and then plays with me.
I wish I could say that I gladly accept their invitations to play and be silly, but more often than not resentment grows in my heart, as if to say, "don't these boys know that Mama is busy?" This morning, HE has revealed to me that the question I need to be asking is, "am I living a "busy life, or a lazy life?" Ouch! HE has opened my eyes up to what really happens in my day.
HE is showing me that though I may start out strong in getting things "done." How quickly I go from being "oh so busy" to laying on the couch flipping channels to see if the next episode of my show is on. Then, when they come to me and want to play I say things like, "yeah that's nice buddy," without even looking at them. This morning HE has captured my heart, and opened my eyes to a journal entry I wrote a few months ago about be able to live a balanced life.
Kay Warren writes "JOY withers in our lives when we are too busy!" I would go on to say the same when we become lazy. Maybe that's just me? HE is wanting me to know that I must learn to manage my time wisely. HE is telling me that I must stop saying YES to all the wrong things, and get my heart & mind focused on doing what I should be doing.
HE is wanting me to know that when I choose to devote all of my time doing the wrong things, I won't have any energy for my family. HE is wanting me to know that my energy crisis most importantly effects my relationship with HIM. As when I am tired, I am irritable, and cranky, and not willing to do much of anything without complaining or grumbling.
HE is wanting me to look really hard at my everyday for the past four months, am I living a "busy life, or a lazy life?" This morning HE is really making me take a good, hard, long look at how much time I waste in my day, either playing on Facebook, watching t.v., sleeping, or just sitting around feeling sorry for myself. HE is wanting me to know and understand how much time I waste procrastinating.
This morning Kay Warrens words have cut me like a knife, as they reveal who I am to my family, and friends. "I am convinced that most of us are terrific liars when it comes to busyness, but the person we lie to is ourselves." Today HE is showing me just how much I lie about why my energy is run down, well to be honest I am always tired, because all I ever want to do is lay around feeling sorry for myself.
This has been happening ever since we moved to our new town. Starting our new life has had its challenges, and rather than being proactive about it, I have chosen to be "lazy" about it, only this morning HE has revealed that I "try" to hide my true self as saying I am living a "busy life" when my reality is I am living a "lazy life."
Annie Dillard says "How we spend our days is of course, how we spend our lives."
"What becomes a pattern, becomes a way of life, and a busy way of life robs of JOY" Kay Warren "Choose JOY"
HE is wanting me to know that the same goes for a "lazy way of life." This morning HE has revealed to me an agreement that I have made in my heart that simply says, "why do today, what someone else can do tomorrow?" Knowing and understanding the truth behind this, makes me want to hide my face in shame. However it is because I know HE loves me that HIS truth is revealed to me through every single step I take with HIM in my journey towards wholeness. I am learning that in becoming whole I must be willing to face all of my mistakes, and allow HIM to show me where I have fallen short of HIS glory in my daily walks with HIM.
I have noticed that when I stay frumpy in my pajamas all day long, and don't do anything with my hair, or put any makeup on, those are the days that are the worst days. Those are the days where I am most sleepy, grumpy, and completely unproductive. HE has shown me that I fool myself in thinking that "Oh today will be different, I will get so much done by using the time that I take to get ready, to actually getting more things done. If take the time out to get ready I will lose my momentum." Oh, Heather, Heather, Heather, when will you ever learn? All this thinking does is lead me straight to the couch, to lie on pillows, and snuggle under blankets, after all I am just sooooo tired, says me after seven hours of sleep. Oh how rough my life has become raising five children. How demanding my family is of my time, and after all I did just do ten loads of laundry last week. Oh how the excuses pile up, and pretty soon, I feel so sorry for myself, that I reach for the nearest chocolate make a pot of coffee, and turn on the xbox to Netflix, and then well, I am gone for the day. Sorry kids, Mama is out to lunch, then snack, then dinner, and well Mama is just out. Don't bother talking to me, as I will only merely nod at you, but I won't really be listening, and ask me anything as this is the perfect time as I most likely will say yes if it means I won't have to pause my show..... again........
This morning HE is wanting me to know that HE is having me share this not to embarrass me, but to bring awareness to me of how the choices I am making affect the life that I am living. HE is wanting me to know that the balanced life, that I crave is right in front of me, I just have to give up the things I "think" I want to do, and do the things I must be doing.
HE is telling me that the very things that I get on my children daily about is a reflection of my guilt as I am the one teaching and modeling for them how to live a "busy life" or is it a "lazy life?" Okay, so I am seriously embarrassed now, as you are seeing the real me. HE is wanting me to start thinking about that if camera's were to follow me around all day long, what would they capture? Would the time that I have been blessed with be used wisely, or will I have had wasted all the time I had been given on doing wasteful, useless things? I cringe at the very thought of people seeing the real me.
HE is wanting me to know that if I will allow HIM, HE will show me how to go from living a "busy life, or a lazy life," to a Balanced life. Today HE is answering my question that I journaled, "how can I possibly manage it all?" HE is teaching me that it is all possible when I allow HIM to lead, mold, and shape me. Therefore, I must keep my eyes on HIM, and my ears open and ready to hear HIS whispers so that I am ready to do the things that I need to be doing.
I am learning that this does not mean letting go of my responsibilities when my boys want to play, but rather while they are napping or playing together, that is the time when I will be able to start the next load of laundry, vacuum the living room, or sweep the kitchen floor. I am learning that the only way I am ever going to be able to model what HE is teaching me is when I change my attitude of "busy life, or lazy life," to Balanced Life.
"It is useless for you to work so hard from early morning until late at night,
anxiously working for food to eat; for God gives rest to his loved ones." Psalm 127:2
HE has revealed to me this morning that because I grew up with a work-a-holic Earthly Father whom I rarely saw,even when I was living with him, I made an agreement in my heart, that until this morning I never knew I made. HE is wanting me to know that from a very young age I knew that my Earthly Father's message was this: "I live a very busy life, other people depend on me. If I don't do it, no one else will, and it won't get done. I won't ever have time for you, as I am incredibly busy. Maybe tomorrow, tomorrow I might have some time for you. You always ask for my time at the most inopportune time, why couldn't you have asked me that yesterday? You, Heather must learn to become self sufficient and stop coming to me with all of your silly little needs. You must learn to care and nurture yourself, after all I didn't have anyone to take of me when I was young, and look at me now, I know exactly how to care for myself, it's time you learn."
This morning i write with tears streaming down my face is the very reason why it was so easy for Satan to manipulate me into the opening the doors of the years of sexual, mental, and emotional abuse that I endured. It was because of the desire and longing that I had to be loved, cared for, and nurtured. This breaks my heart, as the one thing I have struggled with for so long is, "when will I ever be worth it, or good enough? When will I ever be enough?"
I know that HE is teaching me this at this very moment so that I will NOT pass down those very same damaging thoughts to my own children just as my Earthly Father did to me. Today I am choosing to seek HIM and ask HIM to create in me a heart of compassion for my children and their needs. To create in me a heart of compassion for my husband for his needs. I am asking HIM to create in me a heart for my family to love,nurture and care for each and everyone of them. I am thankful that I have been blessed with my family, as I spent so many years alone. This is why i BELIEVE I was chosen to be a Mama to so many, and a wife from a very young age. It is because I know this, that I am hearing HIM this morning that I must choose how to spend my time wisely, I must savor each day, as if it were my last.
"How do you know what your life will be like tomorrow? Your life is like the morning fog—it’s here a little while, then it’s gone." James 4:14
"O God, remember that my life is but a breath, and I will never again feel happiness." Job 7:7
"Because life is short, every season must be savored slowly and actually enjoyed." Kay Warren "Choose JOY"
"For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven.
2 A time to be born and a time to die." Ecclesiastes 3:1-2
"My future is in your hands." Psalm 31:15
I pray today that you will know that your life is just a breath. I pray that you will know what a gift today is for you. I pray that you will savor this day, and take from it what you need to and put into it what you need to. I pray today that you will let go of living the "busy life, or lazy life," and seek HIM to create in you the Balanced Life.
Blessings,
Heather
Heather
Tuesday, February 11, 2014
"Mary"
This morning I am once again being blown away by the current theme that HE is teaching me. The first part of today's theme came through my book "Power Thoughts Devotional" Joyce Meyer. Today's Power Thought was simply this: "I have a balanced life and enjoy my work, and I know when to stop and enjoy other things." This was based off of Luke 10:39 where JESUS tells Martha NOT to be frustrated or have a bad attitude while she worked. HE is basically saying, "work hard, but don't forget to stop working when you should, so that you won't miss the miracles that are going to happen in your life."
Last night I was out shopping with my daughter as she was buying a Valentine's gift for her boyfriend. The thought crossed my mind to have a bracelet made for myself that says "Mary." Though I briefly thought about it, and quickly moved on to other things,this morning it has surprised me once again that HIS Daily Teachings would be about "becoming Mary," only this time it was the Mary that the angel Gabriel came to see to tell her that she would be with child, and HE is THE MESSIAH, and she didn't argue or try to talk her way out of it, she simply said, "I am YOURS. May it be to me as YOU have said."
" Mary responded, “I am the Lord’s servant. May everything you have said about me come true.” And then the angel left her." Luke 1:38 nlt
Once again HE is telling me that HIS JOY is HIS "Blessed Assurance" that HE is in control of my life. HE is wanting me to remember that HIS timing and provision are always perfect. HE is wanting me to know that it is through my trust and faith in HIM, that I know and choose to BELIEVE that HE has everything worked out for my own good. I must choose to PRAISE HIM in all circumstances in my life, even when I am afraid, or don't "feel" like it.
"We cannot have JOY and worry at the same time" Kay Warren, "Choose JOY"
"When your worrying your NOT trusting" Kay Warrens Dear Friend, "Choose JOY"
"Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done." Philippians 4:6
HE is wanting me to know and understand the way I view my problems. HE has revealed to me this morning that every single time I have a problem, I gaze at the problem, and merely glance at HIM. This is very hard for me to hear, and I would like to "think" that my eyes are set on HIM, and NOT on my problems, but in reality I know that isn't true. No matter how much I want it to be true, I fall into that trap every single time.
HE is wanting me to know that HE is creating in me a heart like Mary's. HE is telling me that in creating a new heart, comes a new mindset, of which HE is asking me to trust HIM with everything and know and BELIEVE that HE has it all worked out for my own good. HE is asking me to say just as Mary did, "I am YOURS, may it be to me as YOU have said."
This very thought leads me right into the song "Oceans" by Hillsong United. This song has become the story of my walk with HIM, and just the first few lines, describe perfectly what my relationship with HIM is like. "You call me out upon the waters. The great unknown where feet may fail. And there I find You in the mystery, In oceans deep. My faith will stand"
In my now 11th year of walking with HIM, I know that HE will continue to call me out upon the waters, HE will ask me to view the "mountains" of problems in my life as merely "grains of sand." HIS loving reminders are everywhere I look, and this morning while journaling HE reminded me of yet another song that describes perfectly, and gives me HIS vision so that I am able to understand how exactly I "try" to live my life without HIM leading me.
Last night I was out shopping with my daughter as she was buying a Valentine's gift for her boyfriend. The thought crossed my mind to have a bracelet made for myself that says "Mary." Though I briefly thought about it, and quickly moved on to other things,this morning it has surprised me once again that HIS Daily Teachings would be about "becoming Mary," only this time it was the Mary that the angel Gabriel came to see to tell her that she would be with child, and HE is THE MESSIAH, and she didn't argue or try to talk her way out of it, she simply said, "I am YOURS. May it be to me as YOU have said."
" Mary responded, “I am the Lord’s servant. May everything you have said about me come true.” And then the angel left her." Luke 1:38 nlt
Once again HE is telling me that HIS JOY is HIS "Blessed Assurance" that HE is in control of my life. HE is wanting me to remember that HIS timing and provision are always perfect. HE is wanting me to know that it is through my trust and faith in HIM, that I know and choose to BELIEVE that HE has everything worked out for my own good. I must choose to PRAISE HIM in all circumstances in my life, even when I am afraid, or don't "feel" like it.
"We cannot have JOY and worry at the same time" Kay Warren, "Choose JOY"
"When your worrying your NOT trusting" Kay Warrens Dear Friend, "Choose JOY"
"Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done." Philippians 4:6
HE is wanting me to know and understand the way I view my problems. HE has revealed to me this morning that every single time I have a problem, I gaze at the problem, and merely glance at HIM. This is very hard for me to hear, and I would like to "think" that my eyes are set on HIM, and NOT on my problems, but in reality I know that isn't true. No matter how much I want it to be true, I fall into that trap every single time.
HE is wanting me to know that HE is creating in me a heart like Mary's. HE is telling me that in creating a new heart, comes a new mindset, of which HE is asking me to trust HIM with everything and know and BELIEVE that HE has it all worked out for my own good. HE is asking me to say just as Mary did, "I am YOURS, may it be to me as YOU have said."
This very thought leads me right into the song "Oceans" by Hillsong United. This song has become the story of my walk with HIM, and just the first few lines, describe perfectly what my relationship with HIM is like. "You call me out upon the waters. The great unknown where feet may fail. And there I find You in the mystery, In oceans deep. My faith will stand"
In my now 11th year of walking with HIM, I know that HE will continue to call me out upon the waters, HE will ask me to view the "mountains" of problems in my life as merely "grains of sand." HIS loving reminders are everywhere I look, and this morning while journaling HE reminded me of yet another song that describes perfectly, and gives me HIS vision so that I am able to understand how exactly I "try" to live my life without HIM leading me.
This morning Carrie Underwood's song "So small" is HIS loving reminder how I need to only glance at my problems, and gaze at HIM. "Cause sometimes that mountain you've been climbing is just a grain of sand. What you've been up there searching for forever is in your hands. When you figure out love is all that matters after all. It sure makes everything else, seem so small"
HE is wanting me to know that when I spend so much gazing at my problems, I miss out on HIS miracles, and HIS blessings that HE is waiting to pour over my life. HE is wanting me to know that what I have been searching for is right here with me, and has been all of my life, and that is HIS love. HE is wanting me to know that HIS love is the only thing I need when all else falls away. It is so comforting that HE is speaking to me once again through a song that I love, and never really saw the meaning behind it, until HE revealed it to me today.
HE is wanting me to know that HE doesn't want me to worry about anything, but rather trust HIM completely. HE is asking me to do my best at what I have been given. To be sure that all of my thoughts, actions, and words are good, pleasing, and honoring to HIM. I am learning that this means I must give HIM ALL of my attention and keep my mind off the "mountains" of problems and get my eyes set on HIM, so I will then be filled with HIS vision, and I will be able to see that those "mountains" are merely "grains of sand."
HE is telling me that when I receive HIS vision, it is then that I will be able to let go..... and trust HIM, and BELIEVE HIM when he tells me, "Heather I've got this, trust ME!" It is then that I will be able to live with the understanding that HE truly does love me best, and HE really does work everything out for my own good.
This morning HE has reminded me once again, not to get "worked up." Only this time it is about my problems, the "mountains." HE is wanting me to know that HE is in control, and after all hasn't HE proven time and again to me that HE will never leave me, nor forsake me? HE is wanting me to be filled with HIS "Blessed Assurance," that with HIM I never have to worry what tomorrow may bring, as HE will be with me in my tomorrow's. HE will be there, and HE will help me deal with ALL of the HUGE "mountains" in my life that are merely "grains of sand."
"So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today." Luke 6:34
HE is asking me to choose to "live one day at a time." To trust HIM that HIS plans and HIS purpose for my life are perfect. I must choose to trust HIM completely and know that HE will never leave me to face my problems alone. HE is there, holding my hand, leading me. All I have to do is seek HIM, and ask HIM to teach, lead, and guide me, and HE will be there for me, helping me through every single step of my journey towards wholeness with HIM.
This morning through Kay Warren's writings HE is teaching me that when I choose to doubt HIM, it is as if though I am saying to HIM, "I know YOU were there for me in my past, but what about now? I'm not sure YOU can be counted on GOD, so I had better figure this out on my own." She goes on to say that this, "is a complete lack of trust, and is a quiet form of rebellion."
"Standing on a road I didn't plan. Wondering how I got to where I am. I'm trying to hear that still small voice. I'm trying to hear above the noise. How many times have you heard me cry out,"God please take this"? How many times have you given me strength to, Just keep breathing? Oh I need you, God, I need you now." Plumb "Need You"
This past Sunday I heard this song for the 1st time, well I had heard it before, but never the lyrics. My brother text me and said, "I heard a song that reminded me of you, look it up listen to it." Today I know that it is another one of HIS loving reminders that HE knows, and understands how hard my life has been. HE wants me to know that this song is proof that HE has always been there for me.
As I have walked into my past with HIM leading me, and showing me where HE was in all of the trauma of my past, I am comforted to know that when I cried, HE cried too. I am comforted to know that HE captured my heart, and and shown me that HIS way is truly the only way for me life.
This morning HE is asking me once again to trust HIM, and know that HE has all the details of my life worked out. Though HE doesn't promise that I won't have to experience sorrow or pain, HE does promise that HIS joy, is my "secret treasure" that will only be found when I cling to HIM, and gaze at HIM, and NOT my pain and sorrow that are Satan's hopes that I will turn away from my loving HEAVENLY FATHER.
My final thought for today is this, "HOLY SPIRIT lead me where my trust is without borders, create in me a heart like both "Mary's." Continuing to seek me, as I seek YOU. Continue to fill me with YOUR "Blessed Assurance." Continue to grant me access to YOUR vision, so that my heart, soul, and mind with align with YOURS. LORD, I need YOU, oh how I need YOU!"
I pray today that you will know that you have been "chosen" by HIM. I pray that you will have the courage to say, "LORD I am YOURS and YOU are mine!" I pray that if you are hurting, and feeling as if though the "mountains" in your life seem insurmountable, that YOU will know that HE is enough, more than enough, and when you seek HIS vision for your life you will see that those "mountains" are merely "grains of sand" that HE has placed in the story of your life. I pray for you to be filled with HIS peace that surpasses anything of this world as you continue your own journey in "becoming Mary."
Blessings,
Heather
Heather
Monday, February 10, 2014
"Chosen"
Yesterday after reading my blog to my family, my husband said to me, "Wow it's amazing how what you write in your blog, Pastor then talks about it at church!" All I could think is, that's how GOD works in my life. HE works in theme's so that I will know that HE is there, and I will understand, and live out HIS Daily Teachings for my life. Today I am in awe that once again, the theme continues with JOY and how I am to live out a "JOY FILLED" life.
HIS Daily Teachings today is to let me know that I have been "chosen" by HIM to live this life that I am living. HE is wanting me to know that I must choose to read, meditate, and live out what Peter tells me to do in 1 Peter 2.
It is no surprise to me that my daily devotional for Power Thoughts today was centered around increasing my JOY by speaking the right words. As yesterday our Pastor spoke about what Peter said what we are supposed to talk about. HE is wanting me to know and understand just how I am to speak, so this morning HE is having me read it once again as it has been written.
"Therefore, laying aside all malice, all deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and all evil speaking, as newborn babes, desire the pure milk of the word, that you may grow thereby, if indeed you have tasted that the Lord is gracious." 1 Peter 2:1-3
HE is wanting me to know that in order to live out the life as "chosen" I must let go of any and all intentions to bringing harm to someone else.
" You shall not take vengeance, nor bear any grudge against the children of your people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself: I am the Lord." Leviticus 19:18
" Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you." Ephesians 4:31-32
I must live out a life of speaking HIS truth, and sharing HIS good news, and NOT living this sorrow, pain filled existence that I have for so long. After all, I have been blessed with HIS "Amazing Grace," therefore since I know that HE is in me, I know that HIS JOY is there and I must claim it!
"‘You shall not steal, nor deal falsely, nor lie to one another." Leviticus 19:11
HE is telling me that in being, and knowing that I have been "chosen" I must choose to live out a "faith filled" life so that when everyone looks at me, they will then see JESUS in me and through me. HE is wanting me to know that it isn't enough for me to talk about what I am to be doing, I must actually be doing what HE tells me to do. HE is wanting me to know that in revealing to others that I have indeed been "chosen" all eyes are on me, and if when the storms rage, and the waters rise I deal with life the way the world tells me to, then why would anyone who doesn't have JESUS in their heart, ever think that JESUS is the only way. I must live out my FAITH! I must choose to seek HIS JOY in every moment of my life! I must choose to speak "faith-filled" words!
"And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God." Romans 12:2
HE is telling me that I must NOT look at what other people have in their lives, but rather keep my mind and eyes set and focused on HIM. HE is wanting me to know that HE wants to pour HIS blessings over my life, therefore, I must get my eyes off of what everyone else has, and get them focused on HIM!
"You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife; and you shall not desire your neighbor’s house, his field, his male servant, his female servant, his ox, his donkey, or anything that is your neighbor’s." Deuteronomy 5:21
HE is wanting me to know and understand this morning that there lies great power in my words. Therefore I must choose to speak "Faith-filled" words that bring life, and NOT death. That speak HIS truth about HOPE, and that bring peace to those who are suffering. HE is wanting me to know that JESUS came to bring good news, NOT doom and gloom. Therefore, I must keep my mind set on HIS good news! I must choose to live out my life as a "Misfit" on this earth as I have been "chosen" by HIM to do so! I am learning that I am able to do this only when I "see" that this life that I am blessed with is only my "temporary home."
"There is no peace,” says the Lord, “for the wicked.” Isaiah 48:22
"Finally, all of you be of one mind, having compassion for one another; love as brothers, be tenderhearted, be courteous; not returning evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary blessing, knowing that you were called to this, that you may inherit a blessing." 1 Peter 3:8-9
HE is teaching me that as being "chosen" I must be committed as HE is, in seeking HIS will, HIS plan, and HIS purpose for my life. I must choose to magnify HIS good in EVERYTHING I think, say, and do. Today I am thankful for my Power Thought for today: "I can immediately increase my JOY by speaking right words."
Today I am choosing to speak words of life, love, grace, mercy, and forgiveness. I am able to do this because all of this has been given to me because I have been "chosen."
I pray today that you will know that if you have accepted JESUS as your LORD and SAVIOR you have been "chosen" by HIM. I pray that you will know that HE is waiting for you to hear HIS word, and to speak HIS truth, so that other people will see JESUS in you and through you, with everything you think, say, and do. I pray for HIS blessings and favor to be poured over your life for your obedience.
Blessings,
Heather
HIS Daily Teachings today is to let me know that I have been "chosen" by HIM to live this life that I am living. HE is wanting me to know that I must choose to read, meditate, and live out what Peter tells me to do in 1 Peter 2.
It is no surprise to me that my daily devotional for Power Thoughts today was centered around increasing my JOY by speaking the right words. As yesterday our Pastor spoke about what Peter said what we are supposed to talk about. HE is wanting me to know and understand just how I am to speak, so this morning HE is having me read it once again as it has been written.
"Therefore, laying aside all malice, all deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and all evil speaking, as newborn babes, desire the pure milk of the word, that you may grow thereby, if indeed you have tasted that the Lord is gracious." 1 Peter 2:1-3
HE is wanting me to know that in order to live out the life as "chosen" I must let go of any and all intentions to bringing harm to someone else.
" You shall not take vengeance, nor bear any grudge against the children of your people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself: I am the Lord." Leviticus 19:18
" Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you." Ephesians 4:31-32
I must live out a life of speaking HIS truth, and sharing HIS good news, and NOT living this sorrow, pain filled existence that I have for so long. After all, I have been blessed with HIS "Amazing Grace," therefore since I know that HE is in me, I know that HIS JOY is there and I must claim it!
"‘You shall not steal, nor deal falsely, nor lie to one another." Leviticus 19:11
HE is telling me that in being, and knowing that I have been "chosen" I must choose to live out a "faith filled" life so that when everyone looks at me, they will then see JESUS in me and through me. HE is wanting me to know that it isn't enough for me to talk about what I am to be doing, I must actually be doing what HE tells me to do. HE is wanting me to know that in revealing to others that I have indeed been "chosen" all eyes are on me, and if when the storms rage, and the waters rise I deal with life the way the world tells me to, then why would anyone who doesn't have JESUS in their heart, ever think that JESUS is the only way. I must live out my FAITH! I must choose to seek HIS JOY in every moment of my life! I must choose to speak "faith-filled" words!
"And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God." Romans 12:2
HE is telling me that I must NOT look at what other people have in their lives, but rather keep my mind and eyes set and focused on HIM. HE is wanting me to know that HE wants to pour HIS blessings over my life, therefore, I must get my eyes off of what everyone else has, and get them focused on HIM!
"You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife; and you shall not desire your neighbor’s house, his field, his male servant, his female servant, his ox, his donkey, or anything that is your neighbor’s." Deuteronomy 5:21
HE is wanting me to know and understand this morning that there lies great power in my words. Therefore I must choose to speak "Faith-filled" words that bring life, and NOT death. That speak HIS truth about HOPE, and that bring peace to those who are suffering. HE is wanting me to know that JESUS came to bring good news, NOT doom and gloom. Therefore, I must keep my mind set on HIS good news! I must choose to live out my life as a "Misfit" on this earth as I have been "chosen" by HIM to do so! I am learning that I am able to do this only when I "see" that this life that I am blessed with is only my "temporary home."
"There is no peace,” says the Lord, “for the wicked.” Isaiah 48:22
"Finally, all of you be of one mind, having compassion for one another; love as brothers, be tenderhearted, be courteous; not returning evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary blessing, knowing that you were called to this, that you may inherit a blessing." 1 Peter 3:8-9
HE is teaching me that as being "chosen" I must be committed as HE is, in seeking HIS will, HIS plan, and HIS purpose for my life. I must choose to magnify HIS good in EVERYTHING I think, say, and do. Today I am thankful for my Power Thought for today: "I can immediately increase my JOY by speaking right words."
Today I am choosing to speak words of life, love, grace, mercy, and forgiveness. I am able to do this because all of this has been given to me because I have been "chosen."
I pray today that you will know that if you have accepted JESUS as your LORD and SAVIOR you have been "chosen" by HIM. I pray that you will know that HE is waiting for you to hear HIS word, and to speak HIS truth, so that other people will see JESUS in you and through you, with everything you think, say, and do. I pray for HIS blessings and favor to be poured over your life for your obedience.
Blessings,
Heather
Sunday, February 9, 2014
"becoming Mary"
This past Friday, I unleashed my anger on my dear husband. Anger that had been building for quite some time. Anger that seemed to consume my every thought, action, and word. Though I was able to apologize to him for unleashing on him, I left that afternoon for a Ladies Retreat with a dear friend of mine.
As we were driving to the retreat, the feelings of anger, resentment, frustration, pride, well basically all the things that are NOT GOD honoring flooded my thoughts. When we arrived at the lodge that we were staying in, I was warmly greeted by some amazing women.
That evening the bible study was based on spiritual journaling, and for once I was in the moment and knew what the leader was talking about. As I was journaling, I kept thinking about my words and actions from that morning. Well, of course I should have known that I was being primed just right to hear HIS word yesterday during the last part of our bible study.
HIS Daily Teachings today is consuming my mind, so much that I couldn't even read my current book, instead I was thinking back to what was said during our last bible study, and this morning I know that HE is wanting me to share what "Becoming Mary" looks like for me.
Today's teaching is based on the story of two sister's Mary and Martha. JESUS is traveling through a village and comes to the home of the two sisters. Mary immediately sat at HIS feet, and was consumed by what HE was saying to her. She was captivated by HIS teachings, and didn't move from HIS feet the entire time. Martha on the other hand was running around like a mad-woman getting EVERYTHING ready and complaining that Mary wasn't helping. JESUS lets Martha know that instead of getting "worked up" over Mary NOT helping, she must realize that Mary has chosen to better thing to be doing, and NOTHING she or anyone else could say could tell her differently.
"As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!” “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.” Luke 10:38-42
On the first read through of this scripture that words that jump out at me were: "listened to what he was saying" So often I fail to listen to what HE is telling me to do, and it is during those time that I make the biggest mistakes and the most mistakes in my walk with HIM. HE is wanting me to know that I must listen to HIM, obey HIM, and it is then that things will work out for my own good.
"Consider carefully what you hear,” he continued. “With the measure you use, it will be measured to you—and even more." Mark 4:24
"You must obey my laws and be careful to follow my decrees. I am the Lord your God." Leviticus 18:4
On the second read through the words that jumped out at me were: "worked up." This is my biggest problem. I get so worked up over the fact that my family isn't seeking HIM at the same pace as me. I get so "worked up" over whether or not they are being GOD honoring in their speech and their actions. I get so "worked up" over whether or not my husband is leading his family in a god-honoring way. I even got "worked up" yesterday just by thinking about how often I get "worked up!"
It was on the third read through that I finally understood what HE was telling me. The words that jumped out at me were once again, "worked up." Only this time, even though I heard HIM say it during the second time, it took three times to really "hear" what HE was telling me. HE was saying to me, "don't worry about other people "Becoming Mary, I've got this!" As I sat there journaling HE began telling me what I needed to be doing. HE was telling me to keep my eyes focused on HIM. That I am NOT to allow myself to be consumed by worldly things. HE told me that I must do all things with a good heart, so that in EVERYTHING that I think, say, and do, it will ALL bring praise, honor, and glory to HIM. HE wanted me to know that I must get my mind set on HIM, and stop worrying about when everyone else is going to catch up. I must choose to trust that HIS timing is perfect.
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." Philippians 4:6
"Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." Philippians 4:8
When I heard this story about Martha, and Mary I couldn't help but see that the answer that I had been praying for was staring me in the face. HE was telling me that I needed to be more diligent about "becoming Mary," and not complaining and whining about how unfair things are in my life like "Martha."
Many thoughts rolled through my mind during this retreat, and as I look back today through the resources that I was given, I came across this little gem. Truly as my HEAVENLY FATHER knows me best, HE has once again answered my prayer for "respect."
R ~ Accept Responsibility for what you feel, without blaming others. ~ This for me means that I can't just say "well you make me feel this way," rather I must understand that it is my choice to get "worked up," over what someone else has said or done. I must be consumed with "becoming Mary."
E ~ Listen with an Eenergized heart. ~ How often my children or my husband will be speaking to me, and I find that I am only "half" listening to them. I wonder how often I do that with GOD?!? That very thought makes me cringe, as I know that I need HIM every single moment of my journey. I need HIM to teach, lead, and guide me through every thought and action that I make.
S ~ Be Sensitive to differences in communication styles. ~ This is a tough one for me, as I struggle with the fact that NOT everyone is blessed with the gift of talking like me..... for those of you who know me in real life, know that I love to talk to people. I have been blessed with being able to communicate well, however, in knowing that I am blessed I sense that HE is telling me that I must not get ahead of HIM in my thinking, but rather stop and wait, for HIS instructions. I must choose to be Sensitive to whom ever I am speaking to, as I too once was lost, and was saved by "HIS AMAZING GRACE."
P ~ Ponder on what you hear and feel before you speak. ~ This is a HUGE struggle for me, as how often my mouth is running before my brain has even had time to process, and by the time it catches up to my mouth, oh wow have I made a mess of things..... YIKES! HE is wanting me to know that I must choose my words carefully!
E ~ Examine your own assumptions and perceptions. ~ This is a trap that I fall into as even though it has been revealed to me what my spiritual gifts are, "mercy, discernment, and wisdom," I tend to forget that I am not at the same level as GOD. I am NOT HIM, and I don't know everything. I must seek HIS guidance, in what to think, say, and do in EVERY situation.
C ~ Keep Confidentiality ~ Gossiping is a HUGE struggle for me, as it is EVERYWHERE!!! HE is wanting me to know that I must choose to shut down ALL thoughts that are gossiping! I must not engage in conversations that are gossiping. However, in my humanness, and well stupidity, I fall into this trap more times than I would care to admit. HE is wanting me to know that I must get my mind set on things that are noble, right, and lovely, just as HE is. I must let go of my incessant need to be liked by others, and get my mind focused on "Becoming Mary," all consumed by HIM.
T ~ Trust ambiguity because we are not here to debate who is right or wrong ~ This is another HUGE struggle for me, as well because after all doesn't everyone want to be right? HE is wanting me to know that my life is not about a debate. I must learn to avoid the debates that flood my life, and keep my mind set on doing what is good, pleasing, and honoring to HIM.
HE is wanting me to know that in order to do ALL things that are good, pleasing and honoring to HIM, I must be consumed by HIM, and seeking HIM daily to teach, lead, and guide me into "becoming Mary." HE is wanting me to know that when I allow myself to become consumed, and captivated by HIM EVERYTHING else in my life will fall into place, because it is then that HIS ENDLESS JOY will flood my heart, soul, and mind, and my "true treasure" will be found.
This morning HE reminded me of a song that speaks so beautifully to my heart, about my feelings for HIM, and my need for HIM to teach, lead, and guide me through EVERY single step of my journey towards wholeness. It reminds me of my time spent on the retreat this weekend, and of the time of relaxation, rejuvenation, and reflection that I was able to spend with the one WHO knows and loves me best!
"The More I Seek YOU" Kari Jobe ~
The more I seek you,
The more I find you
The more I find you, the more I love you
I wanna sit at your feet
Drink from the cup in your hand.
Lay back against you and breath, feel your heart beat
This love is so deep, it's more than I can stand.
I melt in your peace, it's overwhelming
This morning as I sit at HIS feet, and listen to HIS teachings, am I filled with hope, HIS hope that HE who holds my tomorrow has told me that I need NOT to worry about anything as HE has it all worked out for my own good. I am thankful to know once again that I need only to seek HIM, and be consumed by HIM, so that my journey will be about "becoming Mary."
I pray today that you will know that HE is speaking to you. I pray that you will open your heart, soul, and mind to HIS teachings as they truly are what's best for your life. I pray that you will be comforted in knowing that even though you don't know what your future holds, you know WHO holds your future. I pray for HIS guidance for your life as you continue on through your journey in "becoming Mary."
Blessings,
Heather
As we were driving to the retreat, the feelings of anger, resentment, frustration, pride, well basically all the things that are NOT GOD honoring flooded my thoughts. When we arrived at the lodge that we were staying in, I was warmly greeted by some amazing women.
That evening the bible study was based on spiritual journaling, and for once I was in the moment and knew what the leader was talking about. As I was journaling, I kept thinking about my words and actions from that morning. Well, of course I should have known that I was being primed just right to hear HIS word yesterday during the last part of our bible study.
HIS Daily Teachings today is consuming my mind, so much that I couldn't even read my current book, instead I was thinking back to what was said during our last bible study, and this morning I know that HE is wanting me to share what "Becoming Mary" looks like for me.
Today's teaching is based on the story of two sister's Mary and Martha. JESUS is traveling through a village and comes to the home of the two sisters. Mary immediately sat at HIS feet, and was consumed by what HE was saying to her. She was captivated by HIS teachings, and didn't move from HIS feet the entire time. Martha on the other hand was running around like a mad-woman getting EVERYTHING ready and complaining that Mary wasn't helping. JESUS lets Martha know that instead of getting "worked up" over Mary NOT helping, she must realize that Mary has chosen to better thing to be doing, and NOTHING she or anyone else could say could tell her differently.
"As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!” “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.” Luke 10:38-42
On the first read through of this scripture that words that jump out at me were: "listened to what he was saying" So often I fail to listen to what HE is telling me to do, and it is during those time that I make the biggest mistakes and the most mistakes in my walk with HIM. HE is wanting me to know that I must listen to HIM, obey HIM, and it is then that things will work out for my own good.
"Consider carefully what you hear,” he continued. “With the measure you use, it will be measured to you—and even more." Mark 4:24
"You must obey my laws and be careful to follow my decrees. I am the Lord your God." Leviticus 18:4
On the second read through the words that jumped out at me were: "worked up." This is my biggest problem. I get so worked up over the fact that my family isn't seeking HIM at the same pace as me. I get so "worked up" over whether or not they are being GOD honoring in their speech and their actions. I get so "worked up" over whether or not my husband is leading his family in a god-honoring way. I even got "worked up" yesterday just by thinking about how often I get "worked up!"
It was on the third read through that I finally understood what HE was telling me. The words that jumped out at me were once again, "worked up." Only this time, even though I heard HIM say it during the second time, it took three times to really "hear" what HE was telling me. HE was saying to me, "don't worry about other people "Becoming Mary, I've got this!" As I sat there journaling HE began telling me what I needed to be doing. HE was telling me to keep my eyes focused on HIM. That I am NOT to allow myself to be consumed by worldly things. HE told me that I must do all things with a good heart, so that in EVERYTHING that I think, say, and do, it will ALL bring praise, honor, and glory to HIM. HE wanted me to know that I must get my mind set on HIM, and stop worrying about when everyone else is going to catch up. I must choose to trust that HIS timing is perfect.
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." Philippians 4:6
"Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." Philippians 4:8
When I heard this story about Martha, and Mary I couldn't help but see that the answer that I had been praying for was staring me in the face. HE was telling me that I needed to be more diligent about "becoming Mary," and not complaining and whining about how unfair things are in my life like "Martha."
Many thoughts rolled through my mind during this retreat, and as I look back today through the resources that I was given, I came across this little gem. Truly as my HEAVENLY FATHER knows me best, HE has once again answered my prayer for "respect."
R ~ Accept Responsibility for what you feel, without blaming others. ~ This for me means that I can't just say "well you make me feel this way," rather I must understand that it is my choice to get "worked up," over what someone else has said or done. I must be consumed with "becoming Mary."
E ~ Listen with an Eenergized heart. ~ How often my children or my husband will be speaking to me, and I find that I am only "half" listening to them. I wonder how often I do that with GOD?!? That very thought makes me cringe, as I know that I need HIM every single moment of my journey. I need HIM to teach, lead, and guide me through every thought and action that I make.
S ~ Be Sensitive to differences in communication styles. ~ This is a tough one for me, as I struggle with the fact that NOT everyone is blessed with the gift of talking like me..... for those of you who know me in real life, know that I love to talk to people. I have been blessed with being able to communicate well, however, in knowing that I am blessed I sense that HE is telling me that I must not get ahead of HIM in my thinking, but rather stop and wait, for HIS instructions. I must choose to be Sensitive to whom ever I am speaking to, as I too once was lost, and was saved by "HIS AMAZING GRACE."
P ~ Ponder on what you hear and feel before you speak. ~ This is a HUGE struggle for me, as how often my mouth is running before my brain has even had time to process, and by the time it catches up to my mouth, oh wow have I made a mess of things..... YIKES! HE is wanting me to know that I must choose my words carefully!
E ~ Examine your own assumptions and perceptions. ~ This is a trap that I fall into as even though it has been revealed to me what my spiritual gifts are, "mercy, discernment, and wisdom," I tend to forget that I am not at the same level as GOD. I am NOT HIM, and I don't know everything. I must seek HIS guidance, in what to think, say, and do in EVERY situation.
C ~ Keep Confidentiality ~ Gossiping is a HUGE struggle for me, as it is EVERYWHERE!!! HE is wanting me to know that I must choose to shut down ALL thoughts that are gossiping! I must not engage in conversations that are gossiping. However, in my humanness, and well stupidity, I fall into this trap more times than I would care to admit. HE is wanting me to know that I must get my mind set on things that are noble, right, and lovely, just as HE is. I must let go of my incessant need to be liked by others, and get my mind focused on "Becoming Mary," all consumed by HIM.
T ~ Trust ambiguity because we are not here to debate who is right or wrong ~ This is another HUGE struggle for me, as well because after all doesn't everyone want to be right? HE is wanting me to know that my life is not about a debate. I must learn to avoid the debates that flood my life, and keep my mind set on doing what is good, pleasing, and honoring to HIM.
HE is wanting me to know that in order to do ALL things that are good, pleasing and honoring to HIM, I must be consumed by HIM, and seeking HIM daily to teach, lead, and guide me into "becoming Mary." HE is wanting me to know that when I allow myself to become consumed, and captivated by HIM EVERYTHING else in my life will fall into place, because it is then that HIS ENDLESS JOY will flood my heart, soul, and mind, and my "true treasure" will be found.
This morning HE reminded me of a song that speaks so beautifully to my heart, about my feelings for HIM, and my need for HIM to teach, lead, and guide me through EVERY single step of my journey towards wholeness. It reminds me of my time spent on the retreat this weekend, and of the time of relaxation, rejuvenation, and reflection that I was able to spend with the one WHO knows and loves me best!
"The More I Seek YOU" Kari Jobe ~
The more I seek you,
The more I find you
The more I find you, the more I love you
I wanna sit at your feet
Drink from the cup in your hand.
Lay back against you and breath, feel your heart beat
This love is so deep, it's more than I can stand.
I melt in your peace, it's overwhelming
This morning as I sit at HIS feet, and listen to HIS teachings, am I filled with hope, HIS hope that HE who holds my tomorrow has told me that I need NOT to worry about anything as HE has it all worked out for my own good. I am thankful to know once again that I need only to seek HIM, and be consumed by HIM, so that my journey will be about "becoming Mary."
I pray today that you will know that HE is speaking to you. I pray that you will open your heart, soul, and mind to HIS teachings as they truly are what's best for your life. I pray that you will be comforted in knowing that even though you don't know what your future holds, you know WHO holds your future. I pray for HIS guidance for your life as you continue on through your journey in "becoming Mary."
Blessings,
Heather
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