HIS Daily Teachings is taking me through this song, and showing me what it means for my life. HE is letting me know that HE has placed songs, books, scripture, you name all throughout my life to prepare me for this season of life I am in. Every time I feel as though I may die of a broken heart, HIS peace washes over me, and HE is wanting me to know that is because of this little light of mine which is HIS HOLY SPIRIT WHO dwells in me.
Today HE is revealing to me what the last verse means for my life. "won't let Satan blow it out, I'm gonna let it shine" HE is telling me that Satan has been trying to blow out this little light of mine, from the moment I was conceived. HE is wanting me to know that through the years that have passed, he (Satan) has watched in horror that I would choose to forgive, love, accept, and would eventually give my life to CHRIST.
When I was a little girl my favorite song was "I Will Be Here for You" by Michael W. Smith. My most favorite verse in that whole song was : "I'll Shine a Light for You." Throughout the years that song has remained my favorite, and this past February I attended a Women's Prayer Retreat. There I would receive HIS gift of HIS promise of Light for my life.
I am overwhelmed at how much HE has orchestrated in my life for me to know that HIS light, resides in me, and is known as this little light of mine. Even in my darkest hours, I know that HIS light was shining for me. HIS light is the only reason that I am still here, even after everything that I have been through.
When a part of my story was told when I was a young teenager, that was a relief. However, as time marched on, my story was just beginning. It would be years later before the truth of what had happened to me from the time that I was 4 until I was 15 would come bursting out of me. HE is letting me know that those moments were where Satan though he could wipe me out, that he would be able to blow out this little light of mine. However, since HE loves me far too much to ever let that happen to me, HE was there, protecting me, and was sending HIS message of HOPE to me, long before I even knew WHO HE was.
"This is the message we have heard from him and declare to you: God is light; in him there is no darkness at all. If we claim to have fellowship with him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live out the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin. If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar and his word is not in us." 1 John 1:5-10
When I became a Mama for the first time, HE was there, though I didn't see HIM, HE was laying the ground work for me to seek HIM, and to know HIM, so that I would then see HIS little light of mine shining in me and through me.
As the years have passed, I can now see where HE has been working on my behalf to ensure that during the greatest tragedy I have ever lived through I would know that HIS light is there, that HIS light dwells in me. HE is letting me know the reason being, is so when darkness "tried" to cover HIS light of mine, I would still have HIS HOPE, that no matter how dark it became, HE was there, HE was working on my behalf, and HE was sending HIS angels to rescue me.
Even as I type this today, I am awestruck at how much HE loves me, that HE has made it known to me, WHO HE is in my life, and known WHERE HE is in my life. Even when my tears of sorrow fall and drown me in sadness, HIS peace washes over me. Even when a memory brings me JOY which leads to sorrow when I realize that memories is all I have now of my precious son, HIS peace washes over me.
I am so incredibly thankful that HIS light of mine is shining brightly in me and through me. I am so incredibly thankful that HE sent HIS HOLY SPIRIT to live in me, to teach, lead, and guide me through this life that I have been chosen for. I am thankful to know that because I have been chosen specifically to live this life, I know that HE NEVER intended for me to EVER walk in darkness.
HE is letting me know that all eyes are on me, and the world is watching and waiting for me to become an angry, bitter, Mama who has lost her little baby. When waves of HIS peace wash over me, I am reminded that I didn't lose my son, as he was never mine. I am reminded that he is GOD's son, and that he is home now.
Yesterday I was reminded that a year ago I wrote a post titled Temporary Home. Today HE is letting me know that the reason my sorrow isn't drowning me, or blowing out HIS light of mine is because HE is with me, HE is helping me, HE is holding me, and with HIM I have NOTHING to fear. HE is reminding me that this life that I am living is temporary, that at the end of this long, hard life that I am living, HE will be there, waiting to welcome me home to spend eternity with HIM and HIS FATHER.
" He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end." Ecclesiastes 3:11
HE is letting me know that my whole life up until now has been lived in fear, and the reason being is because the enemy has always known what a threat HIS light of mine was, and is to him and his kingdom of darkness. HE is telling me that in choosing to let HIS light of mine shine in me and through me, I am reaching the masses. This is how I know that I am called as it has been written on purpose for HIS purpose that I, Heather would seek HIM, and HE would be my Lighthouse in the Storm.
"The Lord is my light and my salvation— whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life—of whom shall I be afraid?" Psalm 27:1
On Sunday during our precious son's celebration of life service, my husband D spoke the lyrics to the song "Lighthouse." When I heard those words, I was comforted to know that our son was with HIM, and I was filled with confidence that though I have to go through the rest of my life here on Earth without him, I will in fact see him again. I am comforted in knowing that no matter how badly the storms may be in my life, and the seas may rage, HE is there, shining HIS light to guide my way home.
Through HIS light of mine comes a peaceful understanding, that even though I didn't chose for my life to be lived out the way it has, is, or will be, HE did, and HE did it all so that ALL PRAISE, HONOR, and GLORY will be given unto HIM. HE is letting me know that because I am refusing to let Satan blow out this little light of mine, the kingdom of darkness is losing, and HIS Kingdom of LIGHT is winning.
As each day passes on my journey with HIM, I am seeking HIM and HE is teaching me. HE is revealing to me HIS plans HE has NOT only for my life, but through my life, the masses of people who witness WHO HE is, and WHAT HE is doing in my life. I know and I can say with all confidence, that HE is using my greatest tragedy for HIS good, and it is through my obedience in NOT allowing HIS light of mine to be snuffed out, I will be doing my part in ensuring that HIS KINGDOM of HEAVEN is known here on Earth.
I am so incredibly thankful that HE has ensured that every book I would read, and song I would hear, I would know that is HIS love for me, and HIS loving reminder to let HIS light of mine shine in me and through me for all of this broken and fallen world to see.
"that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father." Philippians 2:10-11
Today I am holding onto HIS promises that through my obedience in NOT letting Satan blow HIS light of mine out, I am doing what HE has always planned for my life, and the life of other's who have or will hear my story. I am holding tight to HIS promise that when I have finished this race of life, HE will welcome me HOME and will say, "Well done good and FAITHFUL servant."
A month ago I read a blog, and the writer asked, "What do you desire the most?" I said to have a heart like JESUS, to love people as HE loves them, and to see them as HE sees them. My desire has been increased to, letting HIS light of mine SHINE brighter than it EVER has before. That I would be as loving, and FORGIVING as JESUS was. That I would speak HIS truth so that HIS KINGDOM would be made known through me, and that I will know that I am truly living in CHRISTS presence.
“His master replied, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness!" Matthew 25:23
My Dear Brothers and Sisters in CHRIST JESUS, I want you all to know that though I will mourn the loss of my son for the rest of my life, I am comforted as there is a peace that floods me in knowing that he is with HIS FATHER, OUR FATHER in HEAVEN. Though my tears are falling, and sadness runs through me, HE is building me strong. HE is taking me through this storm so that I will be able to share my story to reach the masses that even in tragedy HE is good, HIS blessings are being poured in me and through me for all to see. I pray today that if you too are in a storm, you will know that HE is there. I pray that you know that HE is working on your behalf, and is making everything turn out for your good. I pray that if you don't know HIM, you will have the courage to seek HIM, so that HE will show you where HIS light is in you, and how in choosing to let it shine HE will do EXTRAORDINARY things in you and through you. If you are hurting today, I pray for a peace that surpasses ALL understanding in this world, and that you will be comforted to know that HE truly is your LIGHTHOUSE in the storm.
Much love, prayers, compassion, and understanding,
Your Sister in CHRIST JESUS,
~ Heather
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