the hard way.....

When it comes to the many tests and trials of my life, I seem to insist on doing things the hard way.  I  know that in choosing to do things that way, or I should say "my way," I wonder just how much I exasperate GOD.  While I know that HIS ways are the best for me, my humanness gets in the way, and takes over.  All too soon I find myself falling apart, and in need of HIM.  I must choose to let go of my incessant need to do things the hard way, and seek HIM and let HIM show me how to live my life.

For me overcoming my addiction to stuff has been my hardest struggle.  I love to shop, for anything really.  Mostly for other people, and occasionally for myself.  I often find myself receiving one good deal, and then it sparks the want that is disguised as my need.  I tell myself, "you deserve it, your not paying a lot of money.  GOD wants you to have nice things."  I am a bargain shopper so I fall for this every time, hook, line, and sinker.  Every time, when the rush wears off, I am left in its dust, feeling worse than before, and often times with little to no money to pay for the actual needs of our family.

It never fails that when I am driven and focused on following our budget, that all the good deals show up in my path.  It never fails that the harder I try to stay focused on doing what I know I should be doing, my addiction becomes a relentless beast at my heels, taunting me, and probing me to do what I know I shouldn't do.  All too soon I let myself be overcome, and then the guilt, and shame begin to pile on.

It has taken me years to realize that I have this addiction.  HIS Daily Teachings today is letting me know that I can break free from my addiction, all I have to do is seek HIM, and HE will help me break free from my stronghold.

"Addiction is one of the cruelest of all yokes because is deceives us unmercifully and ruthlessly."

GOD has revealed to me today that it is Satan's top priority to keep me from HIM.  HE has let me know that Satan is a beast who is out to devour my life.  HE has let me know that just as Satan is my enemy, he is also GOD'S.  Today HE is revealing to me the lies that Satan fills my head with.

The first of many lies I am told is it is my friend, and it is my source of comfort.  However,  GOD'S truth is this,  HE is my true friend, and HE is my only true source of comfort.  HE is the one who can, will, and does wash away my sins.   HE is the one who can, will, and does make me whole again.  I know that I must choose HIM every single moment of my life, so that I will be able to live my life with freedom and in live in peace.

"Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded." James 4:8

"You are my friends if you do what I command." John 15:14

The second lie I am told is I "need" it to survive.  However, GOD'S truth is that HE will meet all of my needs abundantly!  With HIM, I will not be in "need" for anything.  HE can, will, and does provide for me every time!

"And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:19

The third lie I am told is that it will make me feel powerful.  However, GOD'S truth says, that HE is my strength, and only HE can provide me with strength.  I must choose to rebuke Satan's lies of my life, and speak HIS truth over the lies I am told.  GOD wants me to know that when I believe the enemy's lies nothing makes me feel more powerless.

"I can do all this through him who gives me strength." Philippians 4:13

"He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak." Isaiah 40:29

"So do not fear for I am with you, do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand" Isaiah 41:10

Today I am realizing that without GOD it is terribly hard for me to overcome the relentless beast known as addiction.   GOD has revealed to me that HE wants to set me free from my addiction, therefore I must NEVER be accepting of my failures in seeking to overcome the beast.  I must not wait till I get to Heaven to receive HIS healing touch.  I must know and remember that with GOD I can do anything.  HE can, will, and does redeem me, and pours HIS love and grace over my life.  I know without a doubt that my redeemer lives.

"The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold." Psalm 18:2

This morning I find it very comforting that when I began searching what GOD being my redeemer means, HE brought me to my favorite Psalm, and reminded me of my 1st born son's favorite song, "Redeemer" by Nicole C. Mullins.   Today I am seeking comfort from my Heavenly Father who knows and loves me best.  Today I am choosing HIS will for my life, and follows HIS path, and HIS plans for my life.  Today I am rejoicing because I know that I am saved.  I am so blessed to have been rescued at the very moment HE chose for me to be.  

Today I am thankful that for the past few weeks GOD has been working through a theme in my life, about putting on "HIS armor" and going into battle with HIS truth.  Today HE has revealed to me that I must let go of my self-loathing and put on HIS armor.  I know that the only way to truly win the battle of my addiction is by allowing HIS truth to speak over my life.  I know that I must not cower and wait for HIM to fight the battle for me, rather I must be courageous in my faith, and stand up against what is NOT of GOD.  

"Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power.  Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes.  For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities,against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.  Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.  Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God." Ephesians 6:10-17

GOD has let me know that HE can set me free!  I must give HIM my time, trust, and cooperation!  HE is wanting me to know that in setting me free, HE won't always set me free in one day.  HE wants me to know that not only does HE have so much HE wants to teach me, HE also has so much HE wants to show me.  HE wants me to know that while HE can bless me with instant freedom, HE is more interested in creating in me a dependence on HIM.  He has let me know that if HE only needed to deliver me once, then I would only be able to witness HIS greatness once, and in my humanness I would soon forget.  HE has let me know that HE loves me too much to ever let me forget just how much HE loves me, and just how far HE will go for me.

I know that HE wants me to see how great all of HIS ways are.  HE wants me to seek HIM earnestly,  and to allow HIM to teach, lead, and guide me every single moment of my life.  HE wants me to choose to follow HIM and HIS plans for my life.  HE wants me calling out to HIM, crying for HIS help daily, as HE wants and desires a relationship with me.  HE has let me know that with HIM fighting for me, who could stand against me.

"Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good. His love endures forever. Give thanks to the God of gods.His love endures forever. Give thanks to the Lord of lords: His love endures forever. to him who alone does great wonders, His love endures forever." Psalm 136:1-4

"What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?" Romans 8:31

I must remember that no matter how long my addiction has been relentlessly taunting and attacking me, I must know  that Satan is not only my enemy but is also GOD'S enemy.

"It is a means by which Satan himself is seeking to defy the army of the living GOD."

I know that in order to fight the battle against my addiction I must call upon GOD to help me.  I must remember that HIS anger towards my enemy is as fierce as HIS love for me.  HE has revealed that HE will fight for me and HE will break the tie that binds me to my enemy, thus breaking me free from my stronghold.

HE has let me know that though HE can, will, and does fight for me alone at times, there are times however, where HE expects me to fight along side of HIM.  I know that it is through the trials and tests of my life that HE builds my confidence and belief in HIM.  I must trust HIM in the battle that HE is leading me through to set me free from my addictions.

HE has let me know that HE wants me involved in fighting the battle so that I will be able to celebrate my victory in HIM breaking me free from my strongholds.   I am learning that overcoming my addictions may actually be the battle of my life, therefore, I must always be ready to fight so the victory will be mine.  HE has let me know that overcoming my addiction will be my very own Goliath story in my testimony.

I know that GOD'S will for my life is the key that will set me free from my own prison.  I must trust HIM that HE can, will, and does everything HE says HE will do.  I know that HE is my healer.  I know that HE is my portion.  I know that HE is ALL I need.

GOD has let me know that I must not allow myself to become discouraged of someone elses successes in overcoming their addictions.  HE has let me know that it is Satan's ploy to play mind games with me in thinking that GOD doesn't love me as much as that other person.  GOD commands that I declare that I am saved by the stripes and covered under HIS blood, so therefore I must speak HIS truth to my addiction.

HIS truth has revealed itself to me that I do NOT "need" my addiction to survive.  I do however, need JESUS, and HE is all I need.  I know that I will find HIM when I seek HIM, and it is then that HE will set me free from my addictions.  I must believe in HIM that HE will deliver me.  I know that is is through HIS grace and truth that I will truly be set free.

"For the law was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ." John 1:17

"I am in constant recovery from the ravages of my own sin nature."

"Now, Lord, consider their threats and enable your servants to speak your word with great boldness.  Stretch out your hand to heal and perform signs and wonders through the name of your holy servant Jesus.” Acts 4:29-30

HE has revealed to me today that absolutely nothing is too hard for HIM.

“Ah, Sovereign Lord, you have made the heavens and the earth by your great power and outstretched arm. Nothing is too hard for you." Jeremiah 32:17

Today GOD has revealed that anything that is over my  head, is under HIS feet.  HE has let me know that nothing will have power over me, when I seek HIM, and allow HIM to lead me through the battle against my addictions.

"or by the earth, for it is his footstool; or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the Great King." Matthew 5:35

I know that whenever I confess and turn away from my sin I will find HIS mercy.

"Whoever conceals their sins does not prosper, but the one who confesses and renounces them finds mercy." Proverbs 28:13

"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." 1 John 1:9

I know that I need HIM every hour, of every, minute, of every single second of  my life.  I know that in order to live my life as the way HE intended I must have HIS truth in me.

"If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us." 1 John 1:8

I know that because HE is the one who created me, nothing I do surprises HIM.  HE knows all of me, every part of my being, HE knows.  HE delights in me, which for me is hard to fathom, but I know HE does, as I know it brings HIM pure joy whenever I finally "get" what it is HE is trying to teach me.  I know that HE delights in me, every time I sit down and type out HIS Daily Teachings.

"You have searched me, Lord,and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar.You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you, Lord, know it completely. You hem me in behind and before,and you lay your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,too lofty for me to attain."  Psalm 139:1-6

"Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.  See if there is any   offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting." Psalm 139:23-24


I am learning that HE will continue to humble me, until I let go of my incessant need of doing things the hard way.  I must choose to surround myself with people who will lift me up in prayer, and keep me held accountable for my actions.   I must heed the advice of the counsel that HE has placed in my life.  I must allow HIM to reintroduce HIMSELF to me when I stray away from HIM.  I must choose daily to allow HIM to renew and transform my thoughts daily as follow what HIS best is for my life.

I know that my trust is in HIM, and my safety depends on HIM.  

"Those who trust in themselves are fools, but those who walk in wisdom are kept safe." Proverbs 28:26

I pray today that you will seek HIM to surround you with GODLY counsel.  I pray today that you will allow HIM to lead you and let go of your need to do things the hard way.  I pray today that you will allow HIM to renew and transform your thoughts and let HIM fight with you in your battle against your addiction.  I pray today that you will seek HIM as HE is your healer and redeemer.  I pray today a peace for you that surpasses anything of this world and that can only come from HIM.

Blessings,
Heather