Saturday, October 5, 2013

house or home?

This morning as I began reading, I sensed GOD asking me, did you grow up in a house or home?  I knew the answer to that immediately, as I grew up in a very unloving, and uncaring house.  As I stated before I was raised by selfish people.  One of the many ways that confirms to me that I was raised in a house, was the mere fact that I would have to clean our house, before the cleaning people would come.  I never quite understood that, but because it was what was asked of me, I didn't argue, as the wrath of anger would be upon me, and I would much rather just do what I was told, then be on the receiving end of that wrath.

HIS Daily Teachings for me today was so that I may never forget just how important it is to live in a home, and not a house.  HE has let me know that a house is just four walls, with things filling it.  It is a mere structure, of which has no value, other than worldly value.  A home however, is filled with HIM, HIS love, HIS grace, HIS forgiveness, HIS hope, HIS mercy, and what I feel is the most important HIS peace.

Today I am thankful for this reminder that my true peace comes from HIM.  Today I am thankful that HE has let me know and understand the importance between a house or a home.  Today HE has let me know what HIS desire is for myself, and my family.  I was reminded to NOT sweat the small stuff, of my children being children.

Not understanding what I mean, well let me paint a picture for you.  On any given day, there are clothes strewn about in every room.  You can pretty much bet that there will be lights left on, and shoes blocking the doorways.  There are dishes in the sink, and the garbage is almost always over flowing.  Laundry is looking more and more like Mt. St. Laundry, and there always seems to be something sticky on the bathroom floors, and the kitchen floor.

Now as I have stated D and I have been blessed with five beautiful children.  However, because they are indeed children, their version of clean, and my version are completely different.  While I strive to maintain order, and cleanliness in our home, my children would much rather be striving to maintain silliness, laughter, and joy in our home.  This I believe what a loving reminder from my heavenly Father this morning, that is more important that I live in a home, rather than a house.

GOD knows my heart best, and HE knows that I absolutely detest clutter.  So much in fact, that when there is clutter, and chaos, I lose it.  I become easily agitated, and begin to lash out at my loved ones.  

This past week my oldest daughters and I have been working diligently in making our house a home.  We have hung curtains, decorated, washed floors, cupboards, lit candles, cooked, and even baked.  We have created an inviting space room by room in our new house.

It has been my prayer that our house would be a place for us to call home.  However, just as my children and I have a different version of clean, so do GOD and I in what makes a house a home.  Today HE is asking me to release my clenched fists and trust HIM with all that I am and with everything that I have.  HE is wanting me to know that I need not be so focused on the condition of our home, but rather the hearts that reside in it.  HE has let me know that is far more important for me to model to model CHRISTS love to my children, than how shiny the kitchen floor is.  HE has let me know that HE would much rather have me let laundry pile up, and spend time with my children, as my time is so very fleeting with them.

Today I am thankful that D and I have both received the same message about the importance of residing in a home, and NOT a house.  I am thankful that I am married to a man who loves and understands me, and knows just how badly I am affected by clutter.  D knows that when I feel as if though my life is full of clutter, I feel out of sorts.  D knows that follows by feeling unaccomplished, and frazzled.  Which then leads to ultimately feeling like a failure.  Failure as a wife and a mama.  Failure to keep our home neat and tidy.  Failure that our home is never "company ready."  What I have learned is that GOD is not a failure, and anything that I lack in, HE more than makes up for.  Therefore, I must seek HIM earnestly, and ask HIM to teach, lead, and guide me through every single moment of my life.

Today I am thankful for these words written by Lysa Terkeurst "I could have a neat and tidy house where things never get lost, misplaced, or broken if there were no others living there but me."

As I began to think about that statement, I began to think about my upbringing and how I felt growing up as a child, who was taught that her worth would be found in what she did, and not who she was.  Growing up that way, was very damaging for me, and it took years of spending time in HIS word for me to fully understand that its not about what I do, but about WHOSE I am.

I am realizing that I would much rather have home full of life, joy, laughter, and fun., than a neat and tidy house, where you could eat off the kitchen floor.  Today HE has captured my heart once again about the things that really matter, and what matters right this very moment is this:  How boring my life would be without these amazing loud, fun, silly people whom I get to live life with every single day!

Someone once wrote me and let me know just how blessed I am.  At the time, I wasn't feeling very blessed, as I was going through a major storm myself, however, when I think back to their words now, I can see that it was the beginning of this reoccurring theme in my life of a difference between a house or a home.  They told me that because I have a home which is filled with my family, then I have been truly blessed beyond all measure. 

Oh how true those words are to me today!  So today when you stop by my house, I will tell you to come on in, have a seat, and ask you if I could get you something to drink.  Today when you stop by my house and want a tour to see how unpacking is going, I will gladly show you this amazing blessing that GOD has blessed us with.  Today when you stop by my  house, I will tell you just how happy we are to be able to call this our "home."

I pray today that you will seek HIM and ask HIM to reveal to you whether you live in a house or a home.  I pray today that you will let go of the desire to compete with what the world is telling you about what matters most.  I pray today that you will see that when you have JESUS at the center, then you will be able to call the place where you reside "home."


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