It wasn't until I realized that until I decided to become intentional in my walk with HIM, meaning seeking HIM daily, and allowing HIM to teach, lead, and guide me through every single moment of my journey, things weren't going to get any better.
In January of this past year, I began to pray as I never had before, and sadly it wasn't until I reached my breaking point which was on May 24, 2013 that I found myself standing in the book section at Wal-Mart, on date night with D. This was unusual for me, as I hardly ever browsed or bought books at Wal-Mart. However, a certain book caught my eye, and I felt HIM "whisper" "pick it up." The book was titled "Women's Daily Declarations for Spiritual Warfare" Biblical principles to beat the Devil by John Eckhardt. I quickly opened the book to the next day's reading, May 25, and this was the heading that I read: "You will experience a breakthrough" as I read those words, tears began to fall, and I became so overwhelmed with emotions that I couldn't hardly see. I must have stood in that aisle for at least fifteen minutes crying as I read what HE was telling me on that day.
"My daughter I have anointed you for breakthrough. I am the LORD, Your breaker, and I will go before you. I have reconciled you to MYSELF through MY SON and have given you the ministry of reconciliation. Your light will break forth like the morning, and your healing shall spring forth speedily. You will worship ME and sing praises to MY name. The end of all things is at hand; therefore break through in your prayers and be ever serious and watchful for me."
"The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed me
to proclaim good news to the poor.He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners" Isaiah 61:1
Now this is not to say, that I am totally free, which I am most certainly not, it just means that when my life gets hard, and the storms are brewing and the oceans are rising, HE is there, HE is helping me, and because I have been intentional and have chosen to BELIEVE that HE is there, I know that I can get through anything that life throws at me.