Friday, December 19, 2014


For the past nine almost ten weeks now, I have said that I refuse to be depressed on top of being so incredibly heartbroken, and sad.  In saying that I have done everything that I can possibly to do to keep myself from entering that dark place.  This past week however, I stayed in my pajamas one day, and went back to bed during the day.  The rest of the week, well that is until this morning I cried, wept, and took on the worst bad attitude I have had in a long time.

However, since HE loves me too much to let me go on for too long, and get completely carried away in how I feel, HE has once again capture my heart and my attention, in bringing my bad attitude to light, by SHINING HIS light upon me, and showing me where I have fallen short when it comes to just how much I have strayed from I refuse. 

HIS Daily Teachings today is letting me know that it is NEVER going to be a part of my journey where I slip away from HIM, and lose my FAITH in HIM all together.  HE is reminding me once again that I haven't come this far to stop now.  HE is filling me with the strength and courage that I am needing to continue on this journey called life with HIM, teaching, leading, and guiding me.

Today HIS word is truly a lamp unto my feet, and HE is truly guiding my every step.  HIS filling me with HIS truth started in my first devotional today.  HE reminded me that HE is the only ONE WHO will give me rest.  HE is wanting me to know that in HIS loving arms is the only place where I can dwell safely.  HE is reminding me that though I may "think" that things of this world may seem to offer comfort, peace, and safety..... HE is reminding me that the enemy would like NOTHING more than to see me tripped up in my thinking, and that is WHY HE has captured my heart and attention once again that HE is ALL I WILL EVER NEED!!!

HE promises to always provide a safe place for me to fall and to rest so that I will be able to be restored, and receive HIS strength, HIS comfort, HIS peace, all of which will pour HIS true healing into my weary, aching, and broken heart and soul.  HE is reminding me that HE began to teach me all about trusting in HIM, and resting in HIM five years ago.  It was until this morning that I was able to fully grasp just what HE means by saying that to me.  HE is letting me know once again that HE is truly in the details of every single part of my journey.

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30

In seeking what HE was saying to me, I looked HIS word up in The Message Bible, and HIS word really began to speak to me today.  

"Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.” Matthew 11:28-30 The Message

HE is letting me know that HE knows how tired I am, how worn out I am.  HE is telling me that HE knows just how incredibly burned out I am on constantly being in a test, trial, or storm in my life.  HE is telling me that HE designed me to be HIS warrior, and is letting me know that while HE designed me to be that way, HE also made sure that I would know and understand that in ALL of these tests, trials, and storms, HE is there.  HE is wanting me to always remember that NOT only is HE always there, but HE cares deeply for me, so much that HE made sure that I would know that no matter how hard my life gets, I am NEVER alone.   

HE is teaching me that I whenever I feel as if though I am alone, I, Heather, HIS faithful follower, must rebuke that thought, as HE has taken so much time in my walks with HIM to ensure me that NO matter how much the enemy would like nothing more than for me to "think" and "feel" as if though I am alone, HE is telling me that NEVER do I EVER have to worry about that, as HE will NEVER leave me, nor will HE EVER forsake me.

" Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” Deuteronomy 31:6

HE is reminding me once again that the spirit of fear, anxiety, discontent, worry, stress, ALL of those things are NOT from HIM.  HE is telling me that this is WHY HE has been teaching, leading, and guiding me on this journey towards wholeness with HIM to be able to say that while under attack that I REFUSE to stop now, so that I won't shrink back when things get hard, the fire burns hotter, and my heart shatters into a million pieces.  HE is reminding me once again that HE created me, and is the ONLY ONE WHO can put my heart back together. 

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." Philippians 4:6

" But we do not belong to those who shrink back and are destroyed, but to those who have faith and are saved." Hebrews 10:39

HE is letting me know that this time, because I know that HE is indeed building me strong, I know that HE is strengthening my heart to love deeper, trust stronger, and live more intentionally, all because HE has taught me the utmost importance of I, Heather, refuse to give into the battle's that have already been won for me.  

" Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us,  fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.  Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart." Hebrews 12:1-3

HE is reminding me of WHY HE has NEVER allowed me to forget why it is the utmost importance that I run this race of life, through my FAITH in HIM in saying, "I REFUSE to let ANYTHING, or ANYONE STOP ME from LIVING the LIFE HE has CHOSEN, and so BEAUTIFULLY WRITTEN for my LIFE.  HE is telling me that this is WHY HE has taken so much time in teaching me HIS word about perseverance, so that when I found myself in the deepest, darkest waters I have ever known, I would be able to lean in, and press into HIS word, and cling to HIS promises that HE will always be there for me, and that with HIM I can and will persevere through this massive loss I am currently live with.  HE is telling me that if ever I feel myself slipping, I must REFUSE to let go of HIS hand.  

"Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we boast in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us." Romans 5:1-5

"We ought always to thank God for you, brothers and sisters, and rightly so, because your faith is growing more and more, and the love all of you have for one another is increasing. Therefore, among God’s churches we boast about your perseverance and faith in all the persecutions and trials you are enduring." 2 Thessalonians 1:3-4

"But the Lord is faithful, and he will strengthen you and protect you from the evil one.  We have confidence in the Lord that you are doing and will continue to do the things we command.  May the Lord direct your hearts into God’s love and Christ’s perseverance." 2 Thessalonians 3:3-5

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.  Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." James 1:2-4

" As you know, we count as blessed those who have persevered. You have heard of Job’s perseverance and have seen what the Lord finally brought about.The Lord is full of compassion and mercy." James 5:11

HE is speaking straight to my heart this morning, in reminding me that the only way through this tremendous sorrow, sadness, and pain in to TRUST in HIM, and REST in HIM. HE is telling me that I must choose to say that even when it hurts, I, Heather, REFUSE to give up on HIM, as HE has NEVER given up on me.  HE is telling me that I am able to do this when I seek HIM, HIS truth, HIS word, and TRUST HIM, that in HIS timing, and provision, HE will restore me, and NOT only that but HE will give me double for all the trouble that I have had to endure.

"Return to your fortress, you prisoners of hope;  even now I announce that I will restore twice as much to you." Zechariah 9:12

"Instead of your shame you will receive a double portion, and instead of disgrace you will rejoice in your inheritance. And so you will inherit a double portion in your land, and everlasting joy will be yours." Isaiah 61:7

" since God had planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect." Hebrews 11:40

"Not one of these people, even though their lives of faith were exemplary, got their hands on what was promised. God had a better plan for us: that their faith and our faith would come together to make one completed whole, their lives of faith not complete apart from ours." Hebrews 11:39-40 The Message Bible

HE is reminding me once again that HE has been working on my heart, and weaving HIS word into it, so that I would know and understand that the ONLY way I will EVER be able to fully understand and know what HIS word means for my life, is when I rend my heart, let go of my foolish ways, seek FIRST HIS WILL, HIS KINGDOM for my life, and trust in HIM and rest in HIM that when the waters rise, and the storms rage in my life, HE is there, and HE will help me, I need only to remember that ALL I have to do when I find myself in the vast, deep ocean, all i have to do is reach up, and say, "LORD I REFUSE to do things my way, let YOUR will be done LORD, always."  

"Rend your heart and not your garments. Return to the Lord your God,  for he is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love, and he relents from sending calamity." Joel 2:13

"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." Matthew 6:33

"My son, do not forget my teaching, but keep my commands in your heart, for they will prolong your life many years and bring you peace and prosperity. Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart. Then you will win favor and a good name in the sight of God and man. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:1-6

Today my Dear Brothers and Sisters in CHRIST JESUS, I pray that in my sharing this part of my journey with you, will be able to SEE HIM where HE has been, is, and will always been on your journey that you call life.  I pray today that you will have the courage to STAND UP, STAND FIRM in your FAITH in HIM by choosing to say to the enemy that you too REFUSE to let these tests, trials, and storms wipe you out.  I pray today that you will know that whatever it is that you may be going through, whether its sickness, marital problems, difficulties with your children, financial,if you too are suffering a massive loss in your life..... whatever it may be, that you will be able to TRUST in HIM, and REST in HIM, in knowing that when you let go of doing things your way, and seek HIM, and HIS KINGDOM first that HE will pour HIS blessing and favor over your life.  I pray for peace, comfort for your weary, aching, and broken hearts.  I pray for full restoration of your FAITH in HIM, and for your overall health, so that you too will be able to RUN this race with perseverance, in TRUSTING and KNOWING that HE has it all worked out for your good.  I pray today that you will SEE HIS presence, and feel HIS love, and know that you too are so incredibly, and deeply loved by HIM, OUR FATHER in HEAVEN, THE AUTHOR of our lives, and the PERFECTER of our FAITH.

Much love, prayers, blessings, compassion, and grace,

Your Sister in CHRIST JESUS,

~ Heather 

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